Boredom
by AngelKnightKyaro
Summary: You can't expect the Phantasia characters to stay quiet all the time, right? May contain spoilers.
1. Fair and Square

Disclaimer: I don't own Tales of Phantasia, nor the script format. It's Twilight Scribe's from "Z Skit Theater" in the Tales of Symphonia section.

A/N: Well...after seeing "Viva Tales of," I felt compelled to do this...

Suzu is normal, _Cless is italics_, **Chester is bold**, and Mint is underlined,_** and Klarth is bold and italics. **_

* * *

"Fair and Square"

"Umm…Cless?"

_"Yes?"_

"Why exactly do you insist on standing your ground instead of dodging the attack?"

**"Ugh…here we go again…"**

_"Running around is a sign of cowardice! You have to fight fair and square from the front!"_

_**"Then, how exactly do you explain us as fighting fair and square?"**_

"All of your attacks on that little snow bunny may have been a bit much…"

_"Th…That is…"_

* * *

A/N: This is my first time doing this so...I hope you enjoyed it. Feel free to give any criticism.


	2. Alvanista Crab

Disclaimer: I don't own this game in any way.

A/N: Don't you just hate that crab?

Cless is normal, _Arche is italics, _**Klarth is bold**, and Mint is underlined.

* * *

"Alvanista Crab"

"What do you want from me, crab?!"

"W,what's he up to?"

"Um, could I please ask you to step aside?"

"I'd really like it if you'd move…"

"Won't you please step aside for me, just for a second?"

"Could you please move?"

_"Cless…you're talking to a crab…"_

**"Let's just go…"**

"This is ridiculous!"

"Um…Arche? Why can't you just use your broom to get the chest?"

_"Well, sure but I don't see why anyone else can't do it…"_

(WHACK!)

Crab

"…" (Arche has taken 9999 damage!)

"A, Arche!"

**"It looks rather angry at us…RUN!"**

* * *

A/N: So, Why CAN"T Arche just fly over the crab and get the chest? ...I bet it's really a land urchin in disguise...


	3. The Wonder Chef's True Identity, Pt1

Disclaimer: Don't own.

Klarth is normal, _Cless is italics._

* * *

"The Wonder Chef's True Identity" Pt.1

"Hm…I wonder…"

_"What's wrong, Klarth?"_

"The Wonder Chef said he dwells in The Wonderful World of Flavor."

_"…Where exactly are you going with this?"_

"What is Dhaos is a threat to that world as well?"

_"Huh?! Are you saying that the Wonder Chef is a…"_

Well, these extra pact rings have to be for SOMETHING, right?"

_"…"_

* * *

A/N: Well, how would they know that they can make pacts with 2 spirits of the demonic realms?


	4. The Wonder Chef's True Identity, Pt2

Disclaimer: Don't own.

Klarth is normal, _Cless is italics_, and the Wonder Chef is underlined.

* * *

"The Wonder Chef's True Identity" Pt.2

"You know, it never hurts to try, does it?"

_"(sigh) …O Eternal Sword! Take us to "The Wonderful World of Flavor."_

"…"

_"Well?"_

"You are not welcome here! BEGONE!"

_"W, wha? Who's there?!"_

"(smirk) Spirit of the Gourmet!" Both of our worlds are in danger by a being who calls himself Dhaos! I desire a pact and ask you now, submit to me!"

"Very well. But you must prove your worth! Prepare your best chef!"

"W, wha?"

"I challenge you! *points to Arche* To a cook off!"

_"You…you can't be serious…"_

* * *

A/N: Eh...it sounds sort of cliche to me...


	5. The Wonder Chef's True Identity, Pt3

Disclaimer: I don't own Tales of Phantasia.

Klarth is normal, _Chester is italics,_ **Cless is bold**, Arche is underlined, _the Announcer is underlined and italics_, **Mint is bold and underlined,** and the _**Wonder Chef is bold and italics.**_

* * *

"The Wonder Chef's True Identity" Pt.3

"We're doomed, aren't we?"

_"Do we really need to answer that?"_

**"And just WHO's fault is this?"**

"Well…you never know…maybe by some incredible stroke of luck…"

"Hmph! I'll show you! Now I can redeem my title!"

_"Let the cook off begin!"_

**A few moments later**

"Hah! This'll be sure to win!"

_**"I'll be the judge of that!"**_

_"Wow…he's still sta---_

_**"ARGH!"**_

_"Never mind…I actually thought she IMPROVED a little, but what was I thinking?"_

_"um…due to the fact that one side is unable to continue…the challenger wins by default!…Even if that…THING doesn't deserve the right to be called food…"_

**"Resurrection!"**

"Well, what did I tell you? That went as well as we could hope for, right?"

**"…"**

_**"I…I lost? Ugh, my head! Argh…for defeating me, you deserve the right to call yourself "Wonder Chef!"**_

**Arche gained the title of Wonder Chef? : How can you be able to bear the titles of XX

Cook and Wonder Chef at the same time?**

"Well…(ahem) the Pact?"

_**"Yes…then, upon the frying pan…"**_

**Klarth can now summon the Wonder Chef**

**"(picks it up) Where'd this come from…? !!"**

_**"HAHAHA! What incredible strength…The power that rests within you…I'll draw it out for you!"**_

**Cless has learned "Pansazame," "S. Pansazame," and "Foodization." **

* * *

A/N: If you've played Tales of the World: Narikiri Dungeon 2 (or 3), then you should recognize these skills from the Wonder Chef costume. Hm...Cless walking into battle with a frying pan and turning enemies into food?

...I was considering giving Cless the title of "Wonder Boy," the eternal apprentice of the Wonder Chef!

...And yes, the Wonder Chef was NOT in his right mind when he gave Arche that title...


	6. Fruit Juice

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

A/N: Enjoy.

Klarth is normal, _Mint is italics_, **Cless is bold**, Arche is underlined, _**Chester is bold and italics**_, and **Suzu is bold and underlined.**

* * *

"Fruit Juice"

"We're out of gels…"

**"Perhaps we should cook something?"**

**"We have enough ingredients to make fruit juice…"**

"Leave it to me! (heart)"

_**"Suddenly, I lost my appetite…"**_

"What's that supposed to mean?! Suzu isn't complaining!"

**"It...has...a...rather...unique...flavor...? (K.O'd)"**

_"Suzu?!"_

_**"Ah…we forgot to warn her…" *sweatdrop***_

"We'd better get back to town…"

* * *

A/N: Don't you just wonder how cooking something like fruit juice can make you full?


	7. Mahjong, Anyone?

Disclaimer: Don't own.

Klarth is normal, _Cless is italics,_ **Arche is bold**, Suzu is underlined, _**Mint is bold and italics**_, and _Chester is italics and underlined._

* * *

"Mahjong, Anyone?"

"I was bored out of my mind for TWO HOURS so we could get a set of mahjong tiles?"

**"Only an old man would grumble like that!"**

"I'm NOT old! I'm only 29!"

**"So? You're older than all of us, anyway. Besides, now we have something to do!"**

_"This isn't a game! Dhaos could—_

**"Oh, please! You two need to lighten up a bit! Anyway, does anyone else know how to play?"**

"I will join you."

_"Hmph…you know how to play?"_

_**"I will join as well…"**_

_"…(sigh)"_

**"Tenhou!"**

_"What?! Gah, I bet you cheated! …!!"_

**Chester has taken 8000 damage.**

**"Eh?! The tiles just…"**

_**"Chester! Resurrection!"**_

"Huh…maybe I misjudged these…but still, it's not like we're going to go up and challenge Dhaos to a game of mahjong…"

_"…We should get moving…"_

* * *

A/N: IIRC, if you have a winning hand on your first draw, it's called Tenhou in Japanese. I haven't got a good glance at the hand that does 8000 damage in the PSX version, so feel free to correct me.


	8. The Negotiation Process

Disclaimer: Don't own the game.

Klarth is normal, _Arche is italics, and _**the Shopkeeper is bold.**

* * *

"The Negotiation Process"

**"That'll be 675,000 gald, please."**

"THAT much? Ugh…we'd better get rid of some stuff…"

_"Pff! Watch and learn, old man!"_

"?"

_*Arche takes out a Miracle Charm*_

"Perfume? …You're not honestly expecting to --!"

_**Arche sprays it all over herself and Klarth**_

"Ugh! *cough* Arche! What the hell do you think you're doing?!"

_"It's called negotiating! *drags Klarth back to the counter*"_

**"What'll it be?"**

_"Let's see…that, and that…and maybe that—_

"Gah! You don't even need half of this stuff!"

_"What, do you think I'm THAT selfish, spending our funds on stuff just for me?"_

"Yes."

_"Hmph! I'll have you know that this stuff is for Mint and Suzu, too!"_

"Just for you three?!"

_"Well, women have to accessorize!"_

"Ugh…FINE! Do what you want! Women these days…(mumble)"

* * *

A/N: Well, Miracle Charms are called "Lotus Perfume" in the SNES version. And, Arche sort of seems like the type to go on a spending spree...to me, anyway. By the way, feel free to give ideas if you want. 


	9. Extremely Potent Cooking

Disclaimer: Don't own.

Cless is normal, _Mint is italics,_ **Klarth is bold,** and _**Suzu is bold and italics.**_

* * *

"Extremely Potent Cooking"

"Mint? Mint!"

**"…It's no good…she's out cold. We're out of life bottles, too."**

_**"…I have an idea…May I borrow some ingredients?"**_

"?"

_**(Suzu cooks Miso Oden)**_

"How can I be hungry at a time like this?"

_**"…"**_

_"Ah…? What's that smell…?"_

"Mint!"

**"Amazing…brought back to life with the smell of food?"**

* * *

A/N: Hm...So how exactly can food revive you? I'd imagine someone stuffing it down your throat, then you magically wake up...but then again , it also cures stone and paralysis too... 


	10. Just an Idea

Disclaimer: Don't own.

Cless is normal, _Klarth is italics_, Chester is underlined**, and Arche is bold.**

* * *

"Just an Idea…"

**"Hey, Cless!"**

"What is it?"

**"Can I borrow your sword for a moment?"**

"…Why…?"

**"What, you don't trust me?"**

_"Well, you ARE asking for the Eternal Sword, after all…"_

**"Hmph…well, I wanted to cook something, alright?"**

_"…And just why do you need the Eternal Sword for THAT?"_

**"Well, I just need something to cut up the meat with…"**

"Don't look at me, I'm trying to keep her AWAY from the food!"

_"…So, you're saying that you're going to cut up our food with the Eternal Sword, which also happens to be drenched with the blood of our foes. Is that right?"_

**"Well, when you put it THAT way…"**

"…"

* * *

A/N: You know, I doubt they carried kitchen knives with them when traveling around...you can find a pot late in the game, but that's about it for stuff in the kitchen...no knives, or forks or whatnot. (Unless I'm missing something here) 


	11. Underage Drinking

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Cless is normal, _Klarth is italics,_ **Arche is bold**, and Mint is underlined.

* * *

"Underage Drinking"

"…And getting drunk, as well as being underage!"

**"Geez, is he ever going to stop?"**

_"(sigh) He must have insanely strong jaw muscles to be ranting on this long…"_

"What was that?!"

_"um…w,well what about you?!"_

"What?"

_"What, you don't think we saw you drinking all of those liquor bottles during that last battle?"_

"Well, those weren't for—

_"And besides, you're only one year older than Arche! Plus, you must've drank as much alcohol as her, and you're under age as well!"_

**"Yeah, what he said!"**

"Well, shouldn't you be a more responsible adult? You're the oldest of our group!"

**"ugh…now they're both at it…hey, stop ignoring me!"**

"(sigh…insanely strong jaw muscles, indeed…)"

* * *

A/N: hm...Syrup bottles are called Liquor bottles in the PSX version, so...I wonder how Cless can't get a hangover or whatnot after battle if he drinks a lot of these...


	12. It's Exactly What It Looks Like

Disclaimer: Don't own.

Chester is normal, **Arche is bold**,_ Klarth is italics._

* * *

"It's Exactly What it looks like…"

"…!"

**"Hey Chester! …Huh? What's that?"**

"?! Um…nothing! Nothing that you'd be interested in, anyway!"

**"Hmm~? Let me see~ …! Ugh, you PERVERT!"**

"It's not what it looks like!"

_"Some people like to sleep at night, you know…"_

**"It's not my fault that this Pervert King is—**

"It fell out of Klarth's bag! I WAS going to return it to him…"

_"…? Oh…ah well…how did THAT get in there?"_

**"All men are the same!"**

_"I picked it up after we killed a monster!"_

**"Yeah, suure. What kind of monster drops pin-up magazines?!"**

_"The one we killed earlier!"_

**"Excuses, excuses!"**

* * *

A/N: Yep, monsters drop those things...how'd they get a hold of them in the first place, though? 


	13. Ninja Intelligence Network

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Cless is normal, **Klarth is bold,**_ Arche is italics,_ _**Chester is bold and italics**_, and Suzu is underlined.

* * *

"Ninja Intelligence Network"

"A, Arche?"

_"Hehe, looks like I got here first~"_

**"…Shouldn't you be waiting at the entrance to Ymir Forest?"**

_"Do you know how BORING it was?"_

**"Well, what if we happened to leave without you?"**

_"Oh, please…I always make it back in time, right?"_

"…How exactly do you know when we're leaving? It can't just be a coincidence…"

"…"

_**"Let me guess, Ninja Intelligence Network, again?"**_

"That is correct…"

**"So you guys really are keeping tabs on us, huh?"**

"…"


	14. Curio's Mirror

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

A/N: If you open up the customize menu when you have Curio's Mirror, there's an option to see deformed faces.

Arche is normal, **Klarth is bold**,_ Chester is italics,_ and Suzu is underlined.

* * *

"Curio's Mirror"

"Well, at least you guys finally got rid of that magazine…"

**"…"**

_"…"_

"Well, at least we got something for it!"

"This mirror…is quite strange…"

"Huh? Let me see! Whoa~ Klarth looks like an old geezer!"

**"…"**

_"Well, what about you?"_

"Hmph…I don't look that bad! See?"

_"…(She does look pretty cu--_

"Hmm~? What was that?"

_"Nothing."_

* * *

A/N: Well...Klarth DOES look somewhat old with that portrait... 


	15. Klarth's Weapon of Choice

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Arche is normal, _Cless is italics_, **Chester is bold**, Suzu is underlined, and _**Klarth is bold and italics.**_

* * *

"Klarth's Weapon of Choice"

"Hey guys~"

_"?"_

"Why do you think Klarth fights with a book?"

_"Does it really matter? He barely uses it anyway, since he supports us with his summoning magic."_

"Geez~ you're no fun…how about he uses it to paper cut people?"

**"Yeah, he's going to paper cut an enemy to death (rolls eyes). How about he just uses it to whack enemies because it's so heavy with knowledge? And besides, you use a BROOM to whack people with."**

**WHACK**

**"ARGH…that's…a…lot…more painful than it looks…"**

"Hmph! And besides, if it were so heavy, he wouldn't be able to lift it!"

"It…is rather odd that he uses books filled with ancient texts as a weapon…however, he does utilize the art of fighting with a book quite efficiently. I have never heard of such a fighting style before…"

_**"What are you guys talking about?"**_

"How come you use a BOOK of all things, to fight?"

_**"Well, it's not like I have time to sit and read all of these, so I half-read and half summon when we're in battle. Have you never heard of 'multitasking'?"**_

"…I see…"


	16. Walking on Water

Disclaimer: Don't own.

Arche is normal, **Chester is bold**, _Suzu is italics._

* * *

"Walking on Water"

"Hey, Suzu! I wanna be a ninja, too! Can you show me how to walk on water?"

**"You're way too noisy to be a ninja!"**

_"…You must be able to show concentration…"_

"That's not hard…watch!"

**SPLASH!**

**"Ha! It isn't that hard, huh?"**

"S, Shut up!"

**"Watch and learn."**

"…(glare)"

_"Hm…?"_

"Hmph! (walks away)"

_"(Wasn't that a bit unnecessary?)"_

**"(Well, I got her to stop bothering you, right? Besides, she hates me enough already… Hey, can I keep these water-spiders?)"**

_"…"_

* * *

A/N: All you need are a pair of shoes to walk on water! Somehow, it sounds a bit too easy to me... 


	17. Nothing in Sight

Disclaimer: I don't own this game in any way, shape or form.

Cless is normal, _Arche is italics,_ **Mint is bold,** and Klarth is underlined.

* * *

"Nothing in Sight"

_"Ugh…that's IT! Those basilisks better come out right NOW! This heat is just…"_

"We're all suffering right now, but you don't see us complaining…"

"We're running into everything BUT basilisks…"

**"…I wonder…"**

"?"

**"In Olive Village, there was a gravestone that says, "Here lies the hero who exterminated the basilisks…"**

_"…You mean to tell us that we're burning out here for NOTHING?!"_

"…While that may be true, I highly doubt that Edward would be out here looking for them if they didn't exist…"

**"…But still…it's extremely hot out here…"**

* * *

A/N: Basilisks seem to be extremely rare on the PSX version of Phantasia... 


	18. Kitchen Mittens

Disclaimer: Don't own.

Arche is normal, **Suzu is bold,** _Mint is italics,_ and Chester is underlined.

* * *

"Kitchen Mittens"

"Wah!"

_"Ah!"_

**"…!!"**

"What's with all the noise?"

_"Is everyone alright?"_

"Bleh…this is impossible…"

**"…It is certainly annoying…"**

"What are you guys talking about?"

"I can't hold ANYTHING with these mittens!"

**"It is proving to be quite a feat for one to properly grasp something while using these kitchen mittens…"**

"Oi…is that all?"

"Let's see YOU try!"

"No thanks, I'm not wearing those things…"

"Or what, you'll be less of a manly man?"

"Keh…I don't need to explain myself to you!"

* * *

A/N: Eh...maybe it's just me, but I find it really uncomfortable to grasp something using kitchen mittens...IIRC, only girls can equip them. 


	19. You get what you pay for

Disclaimer: Don't own.

Cless is normal,** Mint is bold,**_ Klarth is italics._

* * *

"You get what you pay for."

_"Gah!"_

"…? Was that your hat just now?"

_"(sigh)…How many times is this going to happen?"_

**"We ARE in the valley of the Sylphs, so…it is rather windy…"**

_"…As soon as we get back, I'm getting a new hat…"_

"…(We're a bit low on funds, though…)"

_"Damn it!"_

* * *

A/N: Straw Hat- A hat with a round brim that could fall off or get caught in the wind if you're not careful.


	20. Personal Narration

Disclaimer: Don't own.

A/N: Don'tcha just love Arche's narration on Let's Go Arche? Too bad it was only on Thor... Anyway, enjoy.

Chester is normal, **Arche is bold,**_ Cless is italics_, Mint is underlined, and _**Klarth is bold and italics.**_

* * *

"Personal Narration"

"The year is 4304 on the Aselian calender…a lone archer—

**"Accompanied by the super-cute, pink-haired heroine Arche—**

"Approaches Dhaos's castle, ready to—

**"Kick his sorry a—**

_"…Now BOTH of them are at it…"_

_**"They certainly enjoy infecting the minds of those young children…"**_

"Well, at least they're getting along, right? Although, using such language around them…"


	21. Parting Words

Disclaimer: I own absolutely nothing.

Chester is normal, _Cless is italics_, **Klarth is bold**, _**Arche is bold and italics**_ and Suzu is underlined.

* * *

"Parting Words"

"As our hero decided to go picnicking with his companions, he was greeted by the most atrocious, repulsing, monstrous…THING he had ever seen. And the person who created such a vile being was who else but the so called heroine Arche!"

_"(sigh) Another of your narrations?"_

**"Hm…I wonder what happens when—!!"**

_**"…(Anger mark)"**_

Boy: "Really? What was it? What did the XX Cook Arche do next?"

Girl: "Yeah, yeah! Continue!"

"Well, you see—

_**"XX Cook, huh?"**_

"Using such language around children…despicable!"

"Ah? Uh…when…did you get here? (sweat drop)"

**"Chester, you're a brave man…"**

_"I warned you…"_

"W,wha? H-help me out here!"

**"…500 gald on Arche."**

_"I still bet Suzu's going to get him first."_

"…And our hero has just been abandoned by all of his comrades…"

"Nipou Samidare!" (Hell Rush)

_**"Big Bang!"**_

"…And as his last parting words—ARGH!"

* * *

A/N: Okay, so Cless probably wouldn't make bets...but I'd think that he values his health. Maybe this was going a little too far?


	22. What A Mouthful

Disclaimer: Don't own.

Mint is normal, _Arche is italics_, **Chester is bold**, Klarth is underlined,_** Cless is bold and italics.**_

* * *

"What a Mouthful…"

"Here!"

_"mmph! …INDIGNATION!"_

_**"We did it!"**_

_"Blegh…next time, don't give me anything when I'm chanting…"_

**"Knowing how big your mouth is, I don't see why that would pose a problem for you…"**

_"Let's see YOU chant and chew a gummy at the same time!"_

**"Oh, gee. I'd love to, but I'm not a spell caster."**

**SPLAT**

"Oi, don't waste the gummy supply…"

_"It's not my fault if it slipped from my hand."_

* * *

A/N: Have you ever thought about how hard it would be to talk and chew at the same time? ...You'd probably choke if someone gave you a flare bottle, or liquor bottle, or anything else to drink... 


	23. Rune Bottles

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

This plays after you've seen the "Wonder Chef's True Identity" series.

Cless is normal, **Klarth is bold,** _Arche is italics, _and Chester is underlined.

* * *

"Rune Bottles"

"…What are you doing, Klarth?"

**"What does it look like? I'm identifying this book."**

_"Isn't your book going to get all soggy like that?"_

**"Not at all, see? Besides, you've splashed this stuff over other weapons as well as gels."**

"Hm…come to think of it, is this stuff even safe to use on gels?"

**"We haven't experienced any sort of aftereffect yet."**

_"Yeah, and it gave these mixed gummies a miraculous flavor~"_

"Heh…too bad it can't do that to your cooking…"

_"Hmph! I still have the title of Wonder Chef!"_

"That's because your cooking must've given him brain damage or something! And your XX Cook title still hasn't been thrown out!"

* * *

A/N:...I should probably put these chapters in order...Blame my complete and utter laziness.


	24. Ambush!

Disclaimer: Don't own. (This is getting redundant...)

Chester is normal, _Cless is italics,_ **Arche is bold**, Suzu is underlined, _**and Klarth is bold and italics.**_

* * *

"Ambush!"

"Huh…you know, we've been standing here for a while and nothing's attacking us…"

"That is rather strange…"

_**"Have you ever thought that we have to get close enough to an enemy in order to provoke them into attacking?"**_

**"In other words, they're making us get off of our butts so they don't have to."**

"Come to think of it, why don't they just attack us while we're talking?"

_"They have no reason to do so (yet). And besides that, we don't attack them if they're talking. That would be cowardly."_

"Yeah, well, isn't it cowardly if they take their time to surround us?"

**"Yeah! And why do we have to let them laugh evilly before they kick the bucket? It's SO annoying!"**

"Um…everyone…?"

_"What is it?"_

_**"Oh, nothing...but would you be so kind as to help us out, since it's YOUR fault that your inconsistent yelling has brought all these monsters here!"**_

* * *

A/N: I'm not really one for titles...hm...did the characters sound too OC at the end? 


	25. Collect 'em All!

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Cless is normal,** Klarth is bold,** _Chester is italic, _Arche is underlined, and _**Mint is bold and italics.**_

* * *

"Collect 'em All!"

"Klarth…is there any reason you're dragging us all over Aselia?"

**"Even if I told you, you wouldn't be able to understand…"**

_"Enlighten us."_

**"Well, you remember that woman in Miguel? The one that gave us this black card?"**

_"You're…actually into these kinds of things?"_

"First Miguel, then Euclid, then Venizza, Arlee, Frezkiel, and now we're on FREYLAND!"

**"Well, that just shows you that I'm not the only one into this seemingly bizarre hobby."**

_**"Perhaps he's doing this to impress Mirald…"**_

**"(…)"**

"Ooh, looks like you hit the nail on the head there, Mint! (Heart)"

* * *

A/N: Well, he's the one with the Collector's Encyclopedia, so... It's either that or he has a case of OCD.


	26. Descendants

Disclaimer: Don't own.

Chester is normal, **Arche is bold**, _Cless is italics,_ Klarth is underlined. 

* * *

"Descendants"

"Is it just me, or are we running into the Wonder Chef everywhere?"

_"Yeah…the past, the present, the future…and there's even a chefbot in Thor!"_

**"They all look the same too! Are you sure he isn't just one person stalking us all over Aselia?!"**

"Isn't that theory a bit far fetched? After all, Elwin and Nancy's descendants look exactly like them."

**"Yeah, but at least they don't pop up everywhere we go!"**

"Well, all of the sailors in Venizza and Alvanista port look alike as well, whether we see them in the past, or in the future."

**"Ugh…but still, you'd think that traveling 100 years into the future, we'd be seeing some different faces, but everyone looks the same!"**

"I suppose I'm inclined to agree…"

* * *

A/N: You'd think after a hundred years' worth of genetics, people would look at least somewhat different, right?


	27. Klarth's Life Savings

Disclaimer: I don't own anything related to Tales of Phantasia.

Klarth is normal, _Cless is italics,_ **Mint is bold,** Arche is underlined, and _**Mirald is bold and italics.**_

* * *

"Klarth's Life Savings"

"O, oh…umm…"

_"(This must be Klarth's life savings…we'd better put it back…)"_

"Really~? What'cha saving up for~?"

"I see no need to explain myself to you."

"Aw, come on~ you can tell us! Right, Mint? Cless?"

_"We shouldn't be prying! We should respect Klarth's privacy…"_

**"I agree…"**

"Yeah, but what's he so protective about? Are you saving up to propose to Mirald or something like that?"

"N, no! She's just my assistant!"

"Or so you say. Anything…special happen between you two?"

_**"Between 'a guy like this' and me? Hmph…he's too stubborn to admit anything."**_

"…"

"So that's a yes?"


	28. A New Wonderful World of Flavor

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Chester is normal,** Arche is bold,** Klarth is underlined, and _**Wonder Chef is bold and italics.**_

* * *

"A New Wonderful World of Flavor"

**Arche's special recipe was thrown away.**

"Good riddance!"

"May it never see the light of day…"

**"Hmph! (Anger mark)"**

(Meanwhile…)**BONK!**

_**"Ow! …What's this?! A perfectly good recipe has been throw away?! Oh, what a thing to do! I shall see it to be my duty to make sure as many people will get to have a taste of this Wonderful World of Flavor!"**_

_And so, the Wonder Chef set out to spread the word..._

_...That was when out heroes found him._

**_"I dwell in the 'Wonderful World of Flavor!' Would you like a taste of my world? (Yes) Then let's get cooking!"_**

"ARGH!"

"GAH!"

(And so on.)

_...Luckily, they happened to be near civiliaztion, so someone took them...to be treated along with all the OTHER food poisioned civilians..._

* * *

A/N: Yep, Wonder Chefs are everywhere...I was considering the line _"...Cless and his companions were never seen again..."_ Hmm...well, what's done is done. And thanks to frostneko for the idea! 


	29. It's Just How Things Work

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Cless is normal, _Mint is italics_, **Chester is bold**, Klarth is underlined, and _**Arche is bold and italics. **_

* * *

"It's Just How Things Work."

"We just ate, we're full…"

_"A monster is approaching!"_

**"Gah! Let's go!"**

**Runs away**

_"Um…Cless, are you hungry?"_

"Sure…"

_**"Ohh, I see how it is! If I cook something, then it's "No, we just ate, we're full," but if it's Mint, then it's 'Sure!'"**_

"Ah, well…no it's not that, it's just…"

**"At least her cooking's edible! And besides, we're tired…"**

_**"From what, heroically running away?!"**_

"Well, we can't afford to pick a fight with every monster we see…"

**_"It was a little snow bunny! Geez, and you call yourselves men?"_**

* * *

A/N: It's either cooking before or after a battle...even if you run away. 


	30. Sharing is Caring

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Mint is normal, **Suzu is bold,** _Klarth is italics,_ Cless is underlined, _**Arche is bold and italics.**_

* * *

"Sharing is Caring"

"We only have 4 Rhea-Birds…"

**"…I am sorry for being a burden…"**

_"Looks like someone has to share…"_

"Um…w, why's everyone staring at us…?"

"U, um…"

_**"Aren't we in a rush here~?"**_

**"…I do not know how to operate this…"**

_"It isn't that hard…here, I'll show you…"_

_**"(Damn…so close…)"**_

"(cough) Y, yes…let's get going…"

* * *

A/N: Cheesy title, I know. Couldn't really think of anything else... 


	31. Magic Mist

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Arche is normal, **Suzu is bold**, _Chester is italics_, and Klarth is underlined.

* * *

"Magic Mist"

**POOF!**

**"…?"**

"Ah! W, wait! It's just me!"

**"I apologize, but what were you doing?"**

"I'm practicing my ninja skills! Sure, I can't create that whirlwind thing that you guys do, but this works too, right?"

_"Ugh, there you are! Don't go running off on your own! Especially with something we need!"_

"(Black squiggly) Well, I need it too!"

"Arche, kindly give us the magic mist back…we're all tired and monsters seem to be abundant here…"

"Ugh…fine! But, what kind of heroes destined to defeat Dhaos run away from all these—

_"You're just saying that because YOU'RE not the one fighting…"_

"Consider it training then!"

_"(Black squiggly) …"_

* * *

A/N: Too bad Cless and co. can't just poof out of battle with the magic mist equipped... 


	32. Nothing's Ever That Easy

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

A/N: I could've sworn that I posted this already...oh well. (And yes, I have a lot of free time on my hands...)

Cless is normal, _Arche is italics_ and **Klarth is bold.**

* * *

"Nothing's Ever That Easy…"

"Alright! We did it!"

_"Let's get this back to Edward!"_

**"I'd hate to spoil your excitement, but there's a slight problem…"**

_"(Black squiggly) And what might that be?"_

**"None of these scales are usable…both you and Cless damaged them quite heavily."**

_"What?! ALL of them?! But…wait, I know! If Cless skins this thing, we'll be bound to find some usable ones!"_

"…"

* * *

A/N: Don't you just get annoyed when you're hunting these things down and they don't drop anything?


	33. Something New

Disclaimer: I own nothing. If I did, then...*points below*

A/N: You know that Dramatic Peach Pie DVD for Tales of Rebirth? Well, I was wondering what would happen if Cless and Chester were to attempt something like Veigue and Tytree...

_Cless is italics,_ **Chester is bold**, Klarth is normal, and Arche is underlined.

* * *

"Something New"

_"Let's go, Chester!"_

**"Let's finish this!"**

_"Here we go! Alvein style Mystic Arte!"_

_**"WE WILL DHFEAT DHAOS!"**_

**Cue face faults**

"This is…what you've been practicing…?"

"Ugh…you're both the same!"

**"Gah…you screwed us up! We didn't even get a chance to finish yet!"**

"Finish what?!"

"That atrocious 'pun,' so to speak?"

* * *

A/N: Hence why I shouldn't own ToP.


	34. Dhaos's Castle

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Arche is normal, _Chester is italics_, **Klarth is bold**, and Mint is underlined. 

* * *

"Dhaos's Castle"

"I can't go on…"

"I'm tired as well…"

_"Hey guys…can we rest?"_

**"I suppose…but we are in Dhaos's castle…"**

"Ugh…how many more stairs do we have to walk up?!"

_"Gah! It's like he's trying to tire us out before we reach him…"_

**"(Sigh)…I don't see why all these flights of stairs were necessary in the first place; after all, he didn't even expect us to be in this era…"**

_"Keh…he's probably trying to mock us since he can just teleport all over the place!"_

"Let's just go! I wanna give him a piece of my mind!"

* * *

A/N: Yes, I would've preferred even various puzzles opposed to those stairs...It's just so...tedious!


	35. A Typical Misconception

A/N: I own nothing.

The random guy is normal, _Arche is italics_, **Klarth is bold**, and Cless is underlined. 

* * *

"Typical Misconception"

"Who are you supposed to be? Do you always barge into the houses of people you don't know? Hurry up and get out!"

_"Geez! What's his problem?!"_

**"Well, he DID leave the door unlocked…"**

_"That's not the only thing! How does he not know that we're the heroes destined to defeat Dhaos?!"_

"We weren't even supposed to be heroes in the first place…"

**"Ah, well. We should get going, then…"**

_"Humph…it's not our fault that everyone in Aselia leaves their doors unlocked…"_

**"I suppose we can't just assume whatever we like from now on…"**

_"Seriously, though! It's like they're just ASKING for strangers to go charging into their homes!"_

**"Surprisingly enough, it seems quite peaceful…"**

* * *

A/N: Barging into the homes of people is a common feature in RPGs, yes? And yet, there's one guy on Aselia who actually questions it...

(Okay, so it was Bart, if you talked to him before you have Klarth in your party...but still!)


	36. Gheeth's Shop

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Chester is normal, **Klarth is bold.**

* * *

"Gheeth's Shop"

"Huh…come to think of it, this place is a remote island, right?"

**"Yes…it makes you wonder how they can establish a business here, considering it's only reachable via flying or ships, all of which are unsafe to travel by because of Dhaos."**

"How do the shopkeepers survive here, then?"

**"It is a questionable topic as to how they manage to import food here, as well as materials to craft tools."**

"…Do you think that we were jipped out of a ship ride to Alvanista, then?"

**"Perhaps, but I suppose it was for the better. We were able to form a pact with Volt and obtain the Rhea-Birds as a result."**

"Yeah…it must get pretty boring here, too…"

**"(sigh) Has it been two hours yet? I'm bored out of my mind…"**

"Not even…ugh, how long are they going to chat over there? I'm going outside!"

* * *

A/N: Do they even have watches on Aselia...? Considering the average Aselian...how would they afford to buy any of that stuff, let alone reach the island?


	37. The Pirate Aifreed

Disclaimer: Don't own.

This plays after you go treasure hunting, but before you find Aifreed's greatest treasure.

Arche is normal, **Chester is bold. **

* * *

"The Pirate Aifreed"

"This Aifreed guy must really have nothing else to do!"

**"What are you complaining about NOW?"**

"Well, look. He's hidden his treasure on every sort of suspicious island we see."

**"He's a PIRATE. What else is he going to do?"**

"Well, he was doing this by ship, right? Doesn't it take forever to travel by sea, especially if you're going to sail all over Aselia?"

**"Huh…I never really thought about that…"**

"Really…you'd think he would have a life of some sort! And I'll bet that his legend is even more well-known than ours!"

**"We're not in this for the fame…"**


	38. Don't Rely on Others

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

A/N: This plays if you win a battle with all the males paralyzed, and Arche and Mint are out of your formation.

Arche is normal, **Mint is bold**, _Cless is italics_, Klarth is underlined, and _**Chester is bold and italics.**_

* * *

"Don't Rely on Others…"

"Hm…Hey Mint!"

**"What is it, Arche?"**

"Have you ever thought about tying up your hair?"

**"No, I've never really thought about it…"**

"It never hurts to try! A girl has to look her best (heart)"

**"Well…right now?"**

"I'm sure Cless would like it (hearts)~"

**"E, eh? W, well…"**

"Here~ I'll do it for you!"

"That was a formidable opponent…"

_"Yes…Mint, can you heal us?"_

"We're busy!"

"(Black squiggly) You're too busy to help us?!"

_**"I…can't…move…"**_

"Gah! You made me mess up! Now I have to start all over again!"

_"Can't you…help us first…?"_

**"Um…Arche? Was that Cless I heard?"**

"Yeah, yeah. They're just complaining about stuff, you know? Typical men!"

**"…"**

_**"…How long are going to be we stuck like this…?"**_

"(Sigh)…Where's Suzu?"

* * *

A/N: Let's just say Mint and Arche were gossiping at the time...


	39. Bitter Tastes

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

This plays if you talk to a maid and they offer you tea.

Suzu is normal,** Klarth is bold**, _Chester is italics_, and Arche is underlined.

* * *

"Bitter Tastes"

"…"

_"Blegh! It's so…bitter!"_

"How can you stand this stuff, Suzu?"

"It is a common drink in Japoni…"

**"I suppose you two haven't acquired that refined taste for green tea?"**

"So it's an old person thing?"

"…"

"No offense, Suzu…"

**"Well, I certainly find it better than coffee…"**

"Ugh…they both taste horrible…"

_"At least we can agree on something…"_

"I assume that you wouldn't be interested in the recipe, then?"

* * *

A/N: Nearly every maid offers you tea (or coffee, sometimes) and yet you don't get the recipe for it. (Personally, I like green tea...never tasted coffee before, but I heard it's horrible.) *cough* Yes, the Wonder Chef would rather introduce Arche's Melon Bread recipe compared to tea...


	40. Nature's Frying Pan

Disclaimer: Don't own.

This plays if Arche has the Tidal Wave spell, and you head to Freyland.

_Cless is italics_, **Klarth is bold,** Arche is normal, and Mint is underlined.

* * *

"Nature's Frying Pan"

_"Augh…so hot…"_

**"Indeed…"**

"Ugh...I know! TIDAL WAVE!"

_**"NO!"**_

**Whoosh! Sizzle**

"Kyaaa!"

_"…It…burns…."_

**"Mint…please…save us…"**

"Ah! Klarth! Cless! Arche! How did you receive such horrendous burns?"

**"Don't…remind…us…"**

_"Let's…get…out…of…here…quickly!"_

"I…think…I'm…gonna…die…"

* * *

A/N: There's a skit in the PSX version where Klarth summons Undine to cool off, and the water instantly came to a boil. (Only Cless and Klarth were present in the skit). Yes...I've experienced the pleasure of having burning sauce dumped on my hand. Wasn't pretty.


	41. Mirage

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Arche is normal, **Chester is bold**, _Klarth is italics_, and Cless is underlined.

* * *

"Mirage"

"Hey guys…I see something…up ahead…"

**"Yeah…me too…"**

"It's…a giant…ice cream cone…"

_"What are you talking about…? Can't you see that Mirald's waiting for me?"_

**"Ami…she's calling me…"**

_"She's telling me to come closer…"_

**"Ami, I'm coming for you!"**

"FINALLY! Ice cream!"

"What…are you guys doing…?"

_**"…"**_

"Everyone…? Augh! Mint! Mint! They're not moving!"

* * *

A/N: You'd think that they would suffer from heatstroke or mirages if they're walking through the desert...


	42. I Believe I Can Fly

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

This plays if you have a deck brush in your inventory, and won a battle with Chester out of your formation.

Chester is normal, _Cless is italics_, **Arche is bold,** and Klarth is underlined.

* * *

"I Believe I Can Fly~"

"Gah! What a rip-off…"

_"Chester…what exactly are you doing with that deck brush…?"_

"Wha?! How long were you standing there?"

"Long enough, apparently…"

"I, it's not what it looks like!"

**"…"**

"I was just curious, okay?!"

**"You have a screw loose, or something…?"**

"Since when do men, not to mention human, attempt to fly on a broom?"

"Well, it's not my fault that I was misled!"

_"Misled by…?"_

"It says, "A broom honestly made just for cleaning, but if you just believe, it can fly."

"And you…actually believed it…?"

_"I'm fairly sure that only Arche can fly using that…"_

"Then why was it being sold in a weapon store?"

"Like you said…"It was honestly made just for cleaning…"

* * *

A/N: Then again, this is also coming from the person who suggested that he could shoot farther if Volt electrocutes his bow...


	43. Made for Everyone

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

A/N: Thanks to frostneko for pointing out the typo in the previous chapter...and I didn't mean to sound offended or anything. (When you've been around my friends as long as I have...everything sounds normal to you...Not sure if that made sense of not :/)

Valkyrie is normal, _Cless is italics_, **Klarth is bold**, Arche is underlined, and C_**hester is bold and italics. **_

* * *

"Made for Everyone"

"I enjoyed watching your battle. I'd advise you to claim the red chest first. Good day to you." (Warps out)

_"A statue…?"_

**"Ah…that's the last one to the set…"**

_**"Why does Odin have a collectible…?"**_

**"It's in very good condition…"**

"Maybe he's into this too?"

_"I think it's Valkyrie's…when I met her, she said that the spear Gungnir was stolen from her master's shrine, in his slumber…"_

"And the thief didn't bother to steal the statue?"

_**"…How long were these around, anyway?"**_

_"They weren't in the past, or in our time…"_

"Huh…you think she warped away so we wouldn't be able to ask her?"

**"Hm…it seems she won't let us back in, either…"**

* * *

A/N: I'm not sure where you find the Statue of Justice in the other versions (If it exists), but this is obtained after you fight the optional battle with Odin in the PSX version. (She tells you to claim the red chest first, because if you take the Gungnir 3 first, then you'll automatically be warped out, and unable to return.)


	44. Laser Blades

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

This plays after you examine the description of a laser blade at Freezkiel.

Klarth is normal, **Arche is bold, **_Cless is italics._

* * *

"Laser Blades"

"A weapon born from the advanced science of the people of Thor, whose city sank into the ocean…they should really get their facts straight."

**"Yeah! And besides, if Thor was still in the ocean, then how'd the Freezkiel weapon shop get a hold of them?"**

"Perhaps they don't want other cities to be aware of the profit they are making off of these…"

**"Profit? …So, they stole these from Thor? There aren't any robots guarding the stuff…"**

"I'd think so, but last we checked, everything seemed to be intact."

**"That's true, but…then, how are they getting these?"**

"It's not likely that we're going to get anything out of them…"

**"Hm...come to think of it, didn't we get one of these off of a robot?"**

"That explains why we have two of them now..."

**"I wonder...hey Cless! Can I borrow that for a sec?"**

_"Why, may I ask?"_

**"Can that thing shoot lasers?"**

_"What?"_

**"C'mon, it's a LASER blade! If it's from Thor, can't it do anything cool like that defense system we had to fight there?"**

_"It's just a normal sword..."_

**"So all it does is glow?! What a rip-off!" **

_

* * *

_A/N:It's just another imitation of a light saber...


	45. Klarth's Unbelivable Talent

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Cless is normal, **Chester is bold**, _Arche is italics_ and Klarth is underlined. 

* * *

"Klarth's Unbelievable Talent"

"Wow…Klarth, this is amazing!"

**"Yeah! It's a LOT better than Arche's!"**

_"Humph! How many times are you going to rant on about that?!"_

**"Oh, so you finally admit it, huh?"**

_"Jerk!"_

"That's enough, you two!"

_**"…"**_

**"But still…you don't really look like the type to cook…"**

"…I have a LIFE, you know…"

"But, your whole house is an institute dedicated to research…"

_"Yeah…I thought that you'd be a wreck if you didn't have Mirald to look after you, since you're a *pain in the ass!*"_

"And just what are you implying?! I'm perfectly capable of doing things myself!"

**"Hm…where'd you find the time to practice cooking?"**

"(sigh) You two…are just made for each other…"

**"What?! This loudmouthed brat and me?!"**

_"Oh yeah?! You fish faced freak!"_

"You did this on purpose, didn't you…?"

"Serves them right."

* * *

A/N: Klarth's the second best cook, I believe...right after Suzu. Yeah...he really looks more like the type to bury himself in research and ignore everything around him, no?

Oh, and just a heads up...I haven't actually played ToS. Just read the manga. So I wouldn't really be able to do a cameo with the joke weapons...sorry :/


	46. How to Kill a Land Urchin

Disclaimer: Don't own.

Cless is normal, **Arche is bold,** _Chester is italics_, and Mint is underlined. 

* * *

"How to Kill a Land Urchin"

"Let's go! Majinken!" (Demon Fang)

**"Explode!"**

_"Did we get it…?"_

**"Wha-?! H, how's it still alive?!"**

"AUGH!"

"Cless! (Very pissed off face) Take this!"

**"W, whoa…"**

_"Note to self…never mess with Mint."_

"Are you alright?"

"Ah…what happened? Um…why are you guys all the way over there?"

**"Ah hah…well, y'see…"**

"…Why are you two looking at me like that, may I ask?"

_"N, no reason…Um, let's get going!"_

"...?"

* * *

A/N: How can a giant explosion NOT hit you? The only way to kill those little things are to chuck mahjong tiles at them...

...Even Mint has a dark side...


	47. A Spirit's Tale

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

A/N: This plays after you've heard the first two parts to Luna's tale.

To sum the first two parts up, the world was once threatened by a spreading poison. To prevent this, the spirit of the moon descended from the heavens. However, she was captured by evil men and locked away in a dungeon. In a small part of the world, there was a barrier created by powerful sorcerers, which prevented the poison from seeping in. Hundreds of years later, the small population grew.

Cless is normal, **Arche is bold,** and _Klarth is italics._

* * *

"A Spirit's Tale"

"(sigh) Where do you think we can find the next part of the story?"

**"Is it really worth looking all over for?"**

_"Well, aren't you curious to see what happened to Luna?"_

**"Yeah, but…hey, why can't we just ask Luna herself?"**

_"Because I'm not strong enough to sustain her in this world for long, and besides, I shouldn't disturb the spirits if I don't need them."_

**"Useless old man…"**

_"We've asked everyone on this continent…let's try Freyland next."_

"That sounds reasonable. Let's go."

**"Hey! Stop ignoring me!"**

* * *

A/N: It's never told by just one person who knows the whole thing and didn't forget any parts. Of course you have to search for people who know separate parts of it...scattered all over the place!


	48. A Spirit's Tale, Pt2

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

A/N: A soldier, one day, explored the ruins hidden beneath the city. He was captivated by the beauty of the spirit of the moon. However, the king planned on using her power for his own purposes. The soldier decided to save her. He left the safety of the barrier, with the protection of the spirit. The king stopped at nothing to find them. Once they had shaken him off, the soldier realized that the world had been restored to its previous glory. And so, he freed the spirit. Afterwords, the soldier returned to the barrier, to inform everyone of the good news. However, he was captured. With the King's mysterious power, he turned the soldier into a bug. And that bug became known as the world's first fairy.

Cless is normal, **Arche is bold**, _Klarth is italics_ and Mint is underlined.

* * *

"A Spirit's Tale" (Part 2)

**"So that soldier was actually Artemis?"**

_"I would assume so…"_

"No wonder he looked so sad…"

"It is kind of sad, isn't it…?"

**"Not really…all stories have a happy ending, right? And besides, it's not like Artemis died."**

_"That kind of logic isn't going to help you when it comes to real life…"_

**"Sure it will! (heart) Someday, I'll find a prince of my own and then we'll…"**

_"Of course you will…in your own warped sense of reality."_

"She's…not listening."

**"OH, and he won't look at anyone else but me…"**

"That's…"

_"Yeah…good luck with THAT."_

* * *


	49. Dead Weight

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

A/N: This plays if you have Arche equipped with two heavy stones.

Arche is normal, **Cless is bold**, and _Chester is italics._

* * *

"Dead Weight"

"Eh?! Gah!"

**"What's wrong?"**

"My broom won't fly…"

_"…You sure it isn't because you put on weight or something?"_

**WHACK!**

"I can lift it just fine, see?"

_"Ugh…what was that for?!"_

"How dense are you?! NEVER tell a girl that they've gained weight!"

**"Um…what's that?"**

"Eh? Oh, this is…a heavy stone?"

_"Hah, I was right! You are putting on weights, see?"_

"…"

* * *

A/N: Horrible joke, I know.


	50. Heavy Stones

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

This plays if you have 15 heavy stones in your inventory.

Arche is normal, **Klarth is bold**, _Cless is italics. _

* * *

"Heavy Stones"

"Cless...can we get rid of these?"

**"Yeah, this much extra weight is really unnecessary."**

_"I suppose we can..."_

"Suppose?! We don't even USE these things!**"**

**"They don't hold much value, either..."**

_"Well, you never know. They might prove to be useful someday..."_

**"Barely any of our enemies have some sort of tractor beam spell..."**

"And I'm not carrying one of these things into battle! Unless I'm going to THROW it at something, I refuse!"

**"Let's just leave them here, then..."**

_"In the middle of a field? What if someone walks into it?!"_

"Who's stupid enough to smash their foot into a rock?"

**"Quite. I mean, wouldn't it be logical that someone walking through a field ridden with monsters would pay attention to where they're walking?"**

* * *

A/N: I never equip heavy stones. I just don't see a point to them...

I'm the type of person who spaces off and then nearly trips over something on the sidewalk.


	51. No Wrong Way

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Arche is normal, **Cless is bold**, _Chester is italics._

* * *

"No Wrong Way"

"Hm...let's see~"

**"Um...Arche...what exactly are you doing?"**

"What does it look like?! I'm making a sandwich!"

**"S, sandwich...?"**

_"__What he means is, "Why the hell are you splashing milk and pouring spice onto that piece of bread?!"_**  
**

**"Um...that's a little..."**

_"There's a recipe for a REASON, you know!"_

"I know! I'm not blind, stupid!"

_"Then USE it."_

"What do you know?! The recipe says "Add your favorites! A sandwich has no wrong ingredients!"

**"(Sweat drop) W, well I suppose that's one way of putting it..."**

_"As long as we're not eating it..."_

"Hmph...It's not like I was planning on giving YOU anything! Hey, Cless~ (hearts) You want some?"

**"Ah? N, no...um, you see! I don't...really--**

_"In other words, he doesn't want to eat that repulsing thing you created."_

"Fine! Jerks...I'm sure Suzu or Mint will appreciate this!"

* * *

A/N: And yet, we get to use so limited ingredients for a sandwich...I mean, it's only composed of bread and vegetables!


	52. Arche's Battle Habit

Disclaimer: How many times do I need to say it? I don't own anything!

Chester is normal, **Arche is bold.**

* * *

"Arche's Battle Habit"

"Hey, loudmouthed brat!"

**"And who might you be talking to? (Black squiggly)"**

"You're the one who answered to it."

**"Whatever! Anyway! What do you want?!"**

"What's with that demented grin you have plastered on your face?"

**"Do I LOOK like I'm smiling right now?"**

"I meant in that battle earlier!"

**"What?"**

"You were like "INDIGNATION! (:D)" Do you enjoy completely obliterating your enemies to pieces or something?"

**"Who would enjoy something like that?!"**

(Immediate Answer) "Serial killers…sadists…"

**"(glare)…And just what are you implying?"**

"OY~ Everyone! Arche is a—

**"Why you! INDIGNATION!"**

(Miraculously dodges) "SEE?! Here's your proof! Just look at that sadistic smile!"

* * *

A/N: Ah hah...I was thinking of something my teacher said some time ago to someone...

And that would be "Wow, Sarah. That was the laugh of a serial killer!" ...With a completely straight face and monotone voice.

...And Arche always seems to look somewhat happy when she shouts a spell while everyone else is all serious-like.


	53. The Unfairness of Things

Disclaimer: Don't own.

This plays after you've seen the picnic scene, and left the elven village without melon in your inventory.

Arche is normal, **Cless is bold, **_Chester is italics_, Klarth is underlined. 

* * *

"The Unfairness of Things"

"You're back? Maan, I was soo bored! Did you get the melon?"

**"Eh? Ah...it seems I forgot (sweat drop)"**

_"Must've slipped our minds."_

"EH?! What do you mean you FORGOT?!"

**"Calm down! You'll survive without melon...(sweat drop)"**

"Yeah?! Who knows when you'll be visiting the elven village again?! I've gone soo long without melon..."

"Hm...you know, I don't recall buying melon when you poisoned us with your so called recipe..."

"H, huh? Whatever do you mean?"

_"Huh. You've got a point there. Where DID you get the melon from?"_

**"Arche...you didn't sneak into the forest again, did you?"**

"...I have NO idea what you're talking about!"

"Might as well give it up already..."

"Hmph...as long as I don't get caught, it's fine!"

**"(Black squiggly)"**

**

* * *

**A/N: Hm...how would you think Arche feels, since her favorite food is only found in the elven village, which forbids her entry?


	54. What the heck is THAT?

Disclaimer: Don't own.

This plays after you've fought a Bigfoot.

Arche is normal, **Klarth is bold**, _Chester is italics._

* * *

"What the heck is THAT?"

"What's with that thing?!"

_"Eh? What's with you?"  
_

"You know, that big, white, blob-like thing we just fought?"

**"You mean those bigfoots?" **

"Yes!"

**"What about them?" **

"Doesn't anyone feel like they're just so...goofy?!"

_"...Goofy?"_

"It kept bouncing towards me and it looked like it was trying to say "Put 'em up! Put 'em up!" with the way it was punching at me!"

**"I suppose they could at least look a little more menacing, compared to everything else we've fought..."**

"And did you see its face when we hit it?!"

* * *

A/N: Bigfoots are so...weird! Then again, I also feel like poking it like when someone pokes the Pillsbury dough boy on those commercials...


	55. Leave it to Klarth

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Klarth is normal, **Arche is bold,** _Cless is italics_, Chester is underlined. 

* * *

"Leave it to Klarth"

"..."

_"(What's he doing?)" _

**"(Maybe he's part dog or something!)"**

"(That's probably why he's so defensive about his age!)"

"...I can hear you perfectly fine, you know..."

"(He can hear us too!)"

"You're whispering rather loudly..."

_"Ah, um...what we meant to say was...why are you...sniffing those pineapples?"_

(Anger mark) "This is why I have to purchase the food! If I let any of you do it, then we might get food poisoned or something!"

"(glances at Arche)"

"Don't any of you know how to tell if these are ripe?! Obviously not!"

_"W, we're sorry...?"_

* * *

A/N: You'd figure if Klarth is a good cook, then he knows his stuff, right?

*shrug* ...And that's how my parents tell if a pineapple is ripe or not.


	56. Reminiscence

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

A/N: Happy Valentine's Day~

Cless is normal, **Mint is bold**, _Chester is italics_, Arche is underlined, **_and Klarth is bold and italics. _**

* * *

"Reminiscence" 

_"This bridge..."_

"Yeah..."

"What's with you two?" 

**"Is something wrong?" **

_"Nah, it's nothing..."_

"...What about this bridge?" 

"There's some legend that went, "if two people swear their love on this bridge, it'll last forever."

"Really~?" 

_"Eh. Sounds like some made up story to me." _

"We all used to play on this bridge...you, me and..."

_"Ami..."_

"Hey...don't go all gloomy on us now!" 

**"Yes...I'm sure Ami would want you to be happy, right?" **

"Yeah, you're right. Hey, Mint..."

_"Hmph. Who said I'm not happy, smart one?"_

"What~ever! Eh? Where'd Cless and Mint go?"

_"...Looks like they left..."  
_

"It's about time he made a move..."

_"...(mumble)"_

"Huh? Did you say something?"

_"Here!"_

"For me~?"

_**"(Sigh)...Everyone's in their own world right now..."**_

_"Wha?! How long were you there?!" _

"...You sure know how to kill a moment."

* * *

A/N: I'm not good with romance and stuff...ah well, I hope you enjoyed it.

(And yeah, the names in the PSX version stay the same. In order from the best to worst cook, it's Suzu, Klarth, Mint, Chester, Cless, Arche)


	57. Just a Superstition?

Disclaimer: Don't own.

Chester is normal, **Suzu is bold**, and _Arche is italics._

_

* * *

_

"Just A Superstition?"

**CRASH**

"Gah! (Sigh) At least it's only a mirror…nothing bad is going to happen, right…?"

"**On the contrary." **

(Jumps back) "Augh! Don't sneak up behind people…"

**"I was here the entire time…"**

"Right…ah, what were you saying?"

"…**Breaking a mirror results in seven years' worth of bad luck."**

"…Isn't that just a superstition?"

**"Would I be telling you this if it was?"**

"I…suppose not?"

**"Even if you so much as try to escape this fate by death, what only awaits you is pure torture."**

"…"

**"First, you will suffer through countless nightmares that torment your very soul even after you've repented. You won't even be able to scream."**

"…"

**"Then, you'll feel the pain of a thousand daggers piercing through your skin every moment of the day."**

"..."

**"Next--**

"I, I think I've heard enough!"

**(Closes eyes)"I pity you."**

"…I…I think I'll go find some good luck charms…(Runs away)"

**"…"**

"_Wow, that was amazing, Suzu!"_

**"Thank you. I trust that you're satisfied with the results?"**

"_Of course. He deserves it after that water spider incident! Did you see the look on his face?!" _

**"Where did you get such a strange mirror, though?"**

_"Ah? Well, I'm sure no one's gonna miss it. We found it in Dhaos's castle in the past."_

* * *

A/N: I don't believe in that kind of stuff.

Being sick for the last few days? I blame my weak immune system.


	58. The Concept of Healing

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Arche is normal, **Mint is bold, **_Chester is italics. _

* * *

"The Concept of Healing" 

"Hey, Mint..."

**"You sound troubled..." **

"Huh? Nah, I was just thinking..."

**"Is it anything I can help with?"**

"Well, remember how you told me that when you want to heal someone, you wish for them to get better and stuff?"

**"Yes..."**

"What do you think about when you want to use Pow Hammer DX?"

**"Pardon?" **

"Do you think of bashing your enemies' heads in?"

**"No. Why would I think of something like that?"**

"Eh? Then, what DO you think of?"

**"I wish to aid my allies in battle..."**

"Really? That's ALL? Hm..."

_"Why do you even want to know?"_

"Pow Hammer!"

_"Gah! (Dizzy)"_

"Aw...all I got was that measly thing..."

**"Um...keep trying and I'm sure you'll get it?"**

"Yeah! Thanks, Mint~ Pow Hammer!"

_"...What have you done?" _

**"I'm sorry?"**

* * *

A/N: I think Mint's the only one who can summon a giant hammer to dizzy everyone...and her battle quote is "I'm sorry..."

...I want one of those things to whack my brother with. It looks like one of those squeaky mallets for whack a mole!


	59. Too Good to be True

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

The innkeeper is normal, **Cless is bold,** _Arche is italics, _Klarth is underlined. _  
_

* * *

"Too Good to be True" 

"Welcome. Will you be staying with us? One night is a cheap 12 gald."

**"Wow, that's all?" **

"Hold it. What's the catch?"

**"What are you talking about?" **

"It seems too good to be true. Naturally, there's got to be some sort of downside." 

_"You're worrying too much! Just pay him already!"_

**"Here."**

"Enjoy your stay."

**That night**

_"KYA!" _

**"Eh? What's wrong?!" **

"I'll thank you not to assault my ears..." 

_"There's a dead bug on my bed!"  
_

**"Oh. That's all?" **

_"That's ALL? What do you mean "Oh, that's all?!"_

"He means, just flick it off and go back to sleep!"

_"Are you kidding me?! I'm not touching that big, spiky, cockroach thing!"_

"Ah, actually you may have a point there..."

_"Geez, you finally got it through your thick skull?"_

**"?"**

"Do you think the staff here even bothered to wash these sheets every day?"

**"..."**

_"..."_

"...Don't look at me like that. You guys wouldn't even listen!"

* * *

A/N: Personal experience...


	60. Voodoo Dolls?

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Suzu is normal, **Cless is bold, **_Chester is italics_

* * *

"Voodoo Dolls?" 

"Hm..."

**"What's wrong?"**

"This doll looks rather plain."

_"...It's a reverse doll. What else is it supposed to look like?"_

"Reverse doll?"

**"It revives you if you get knocked out in battle."**

"Ah."

**"What did you have on your mind?" **

"I saw these dolls that looked like others. I have some that look like my parents..."

_"...By any chance...do you mean voodoo dolls?"_

"I believe that's what they were called..."

**"You said...that you had some...that looked like your parents...?"**

"? What's wrong?"

_"...Do you know what people usually do with those?"_

"You two are acting strange..."

**"Ah, it, it's nothing! Besides, it could just be a coincidence!" **

_"Yeah, maybe like that doll Ami gave you!"_

**"Hah...it's not like she was trying to curse me or anything!"**

"Curse...?"

* * *

A/N: My friend carries these key chain voodoo dolls. She calls one of them Fluffy.

...Everyone finds them rather cute.

...Yeah, MOSTLY everyone.


	61. Irony

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Chester is normal, **Cless is bold.**

* * *

"Irony"

"Hey Cless...where'd you get that sword? I've never seen something like that before..."

**"I...found it."**

"Found?" You mean...stole?"

**"What? No!"**

"Then what?"

**"It was...in my house...after the attack on Toltis."**

"So it was from those...!"

**"..."**

"Why are you using it, then?!"

**"I know how you feel, but we need all the power that we can to defeat those guys, right?!"  
**

"...(sigh) Yeah, I guess..."

**"...If it makes you feel better, I'll get rid of it after we get revenge."**

**

* * *

**A/N: The Knight's Saber: Pretty much your strongest weapon until you get sent to the past. (And the reason I nearly got pummeled by those golems in the catacombs! Yeah, I forgot to get it so I was doing 1s and 2s to them.)


	62. Suzu's Thoughts

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Suzu is normal, **Cless is bold,**_ Chester is italics.  
_

* * *

"..."

**"...Um, excuse me...Are you alright?" **

_"...That's a pretty scary look you have on your face there..."_

"(While carrying out your mission, you are seen by an unrelated person passing by. Will you permanently silence this person?)"

**"...Er..." **

"...I apologize. Did you say something?"

_"...Something bothering you?"_

"...Nothing at all. Why do you ask?"

**"...Right...we should get going."**

"(The shinobi are hidden people...If one is seen, then the evidence must be erased...)"

"...!! KYA-AA-AA!!"

_"Cless, you'd better help her."_

**"W, wha? Why's everyone making me do it?"**

* * *

A/N: I was thinking of what one of the shinobi at Suzu's right of trial said. Then I was like, wouldn't Cless and co. fit that description?

"Yep, it's electrocution all right."


	63. Another Person's Treasure

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Treasure Keeper is normal, **Chester is bold,** _Mint is italics, _Cless is underlined. 

* * *

"Another Person's Treasure"

"This is MY treasure!"

"Here he comes!"

**"Hmph. He should think about who to pick fights with."**

"Ah, Mint. What's in there?"

_"It's...a mixed gummi."_

**"...THAT's his treasure?"**

"At least it's something we can use, right?" 

**"Yeah. I could use that right now..."**

"You know what they say...one person's junk can be another person's treasure."

**"Geez, how long have you been hanging around old man Tristan? You're starting to sound like him with "There's an old saying that..."**

"(shrug) It's a common saying..."

**"Right. Whatever."**

**

* * *

**A/N: Yeah...a mixed gummi(melagne, whatever) is someone's treasure. Some creepy guy who was never put to rest dwelling in the catacombs...


	64. Old Men

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

A/N: Hm...for some reason, I couldn't log on for the last two days...is it just me?

Klarth is normal, **Cless is bold,** _Chester is italics, _Arche is underlined._  
_

* * *

"Old Men"

"Don't you think you'll surpass your father some day? Like that old adage that says..."

_"Old adage? Who are you, old man Tristan?"_

"What?"

_"Don't you think so, Cless?"_

**"I guess..."**

"Who might you be talking about?"

**"Ah, sorry, Klarth. Tristan is--**

_"An old geezer. You know, either they're related or all old guys are the same."_

"Old...man...?! And who might you be calling old?"

"Well, lets see~ You drink tea, you're always mumbling about being young..."

_"(shrug) You're the oldest out of all of us, anyway."_

"Tee hee~ First step's denial!"

"Hasn't anyone taught you to respect the elderly?!"

**"Ah...yes?"**

"Hm~ You know, you forgot about gramps!"

_"Gramps?"_

**"She means Maxwell."**

_"Huh. What do you know, you're actually right for once!"_

**"Um...Chester...maybe you should stop...?"**

_"Or what, Tristan's going to haunt us from his grave?"_

"Gah! Young people these days!"


	65. Going Out?

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Klarth is normal, **Arche is bold**,_ Chester is italics,_ Cless is underlined.

* * *

"Going out?"

"Arche. Chester. Where were you two last night?"

**"None of your business!"**

_"Out."_

"Obviously, since we couldn't find you anywhere in the inn."

"Were you two up to something?"

"Ah, you have a point there."

_"Are you implying that I'd actually..."_

**"Ugh! All of you men are sickos!"**

"H, huh? What did I say?"

"...You implied that the two of them were...going "out" together."

"Yeah, I mean where else would they go?"

"...Never mind..."

* * *

A/N: I think Arche follows Chester out once when he was training. (I'm sort of doing this out of memory now since I haven't played for a while)

...Cless is way too dense. *Points to the unicorn scene*


	66. Paranoid much?

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Cless is normal, **Klarth is bold**, _Arche is italics._

* * *

Paranoid much?

"...Ah! Demon Fang!"

**"Gah! What are you aiming at?!"**

"Eh? Sorry, Klarth..."

_"(The old man's actually got reflexes...)"_

**(Black squiggly)"What would've happened if you hit me?! This isn't the first time this happened!"**

(Sweat drop) "I thought I saw that tree move!"

**"We're in the TREANT forest."**

"Yeah, so..."

**"Just ignore them. They're only going to attack us if we get too close."**

"Right..."

**Rustle**

"Eh...? Did I just see something...pink?"

**"You're just being paranoid.** **I don't see anything."**

"..."

_"(Ugh, that was way too close...)"_

_

* * *

_

A/N: We had this whole discussion in class about my teacher turning her kids into paranoid freaks. Why? We were looking at bedbugs under microscopes. And then the freaked out shrieking came. And then we got all the information we needed on bedbugs. And then everyone starts telling their life stories...Yeah, I'd better stop myself now.


	67. Shown Up

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Klarth is normal, **Arche is bold**, _Efreet/Sylph are italics, _Cless is underlined.

**

* * *

**

Shown Up

"..."

**"What~cha doing?"**

"Research."

**"Hm~ Looks boring."**

"Then go bother someone else, if you please."

**"(Ignoring him) ...You want to know if you can summon more than one spirit at a time?"**

"I've already given up on that. It's impossible."

**"Yeah, for you."**

(Black squiggly) "And you think you can do better?"

**"Gimmie the pact rings."**

"Hmph. I don't see what harm it could do. But, let me warn you that--

**"Efreet! Sylph!"**

**Efreet and Sylph appear**

"I, I don't believe it..."

**"That's like nothing to me, of course."**

"...Don't be so cocky."

**"Ooh, jealous?"**

"They're low class spirits, anyway. I doubt you could do that with Origin or Pluto."

_"..."(Who are you calling low class?)_

**"Eh heh. Looks like they're mad at you."**

"What?"

_"..." (Annoyed)_

**"Ah, you'd better run~"**

"Gah!"

**"Hm~ And here I thought old people were wise...Oh, well."**

"Amo...Arche? Why are Efreet and Sylph chasing Klarth?"

**"Ah, they're just helping him get exercise. You know how old men are."**

"What?"

**"So, anyway...how far did you get with Mint?"**

"Ah? We heard some yelling, so I came up to check on you."

**"...(sigh) I guess I'll have to ask her myself." (Black squiggly)**


	68. A Sword is a Sword

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Cless is normal, **Chester is bold**.

* * *

"Hah! Hah! Hiya!"

**SNAP**

"..."

**"You should get a new sword..."**

"It's fine...I can still fight with this."

**"..." **

"It's fine, see? Demon fang!"

**"...Geez, you might as well use this." (Picks up a bone off a skeleton)**

"...(Shrug) That works too."

**(Skeptical look)**

"I'm only training. It's not like I'm going to rush into battle with this."

**"...Whatever. You'd better make sure Suzu doesn't see that..."**

"Besides, the sword shouldn't make up the swordsman."

**"What?"**

**

* * *

**

A/N: Introducing the broken sword: Wasn't that a priceless artifact?! and the bone sword from ToW: RM. (+1 attack? Meh.)


	69. What's the Point?

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Cless is normal, **Klarth is bold,** _Mint is italics, _Arche is underlined. 

* * *

**"Huh. Weren't you using the Muramasa before?"**

"Huh? Uh...well, the laser blade was better, so i sold it."

**"You sold a priceless artifact?!"**

"Er...Ranzo said it would be better with us than collecting dust. So--

**"Yes, better with US.**"

"Ah, but--

**"Don't you think that you should at least respect gifts given to you?! Especially if that gift happens to be a family treasure?!"**

"I, I suppose?"

_"Um...Why are you being so harsh on Cless?"_

"Nah, I agree! I mean, if this is a sacred treasure, then we could've gotten a higher price for it!"

**"I think you're missing the point here." (black squiggly)**

* * *

A/N: Eh, not that I'm complaining. I could use the extra gald. But still...they let you sell it so easily...


	70. Be a MAN!

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

A/N: Yay~Snow day today~

Arche is normal, **Suzu is bold**, _Cless is italics,_ Mint is underlined. 

* * *

"Hey, Suzu."

**"Yes?"**

"Why can't you use the Muramasa?"

**"...It is made for a man to wield it."**

"Eh? So?"

**"I cannot use it. There are weapons forged specifically for male and female ninjas."**

"Ah~It won't kill you to try. Besides, us women can do whatever men can do, right?"

**(sigh) "..."**

"Yeah, of course we can! Oii~! Cless!"

_"Eh? What's wrong?"_

"Let us borrow the Muramasa for a bit."

_"A, ah? But..."_

"What?! Are you looking down on us now?!"

_"N, no...but..."_

"Aren't you a man?! Spit it out!"

**"(Isn't she contradicting herself?)"**

_"..."_

"Amo...Arche...Cless already sold the Muramasa...you were there, weren't you?"

"Eh? ...Oh. Ohh. Right!"

**"You...sold it...?"**

**

* * *

**A/N: Ah, I feel like I'm repeating myself with the comments about men. If it bothers you, sorry. We've spent about two months working on a report about The Tale of Annie Christmas. (Report writing class, go figure.)


	71. The Song that Never Ends

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Arche is normal, **Chester is bold,** _Klarth is italics._

* * *

"Are we there yet?"

_"No."_

"...Now?"

_"No."_

"N--

**"We'll get there when we get there!"**

"No one asked you."

**"If you weren't a girl, I'd..."**

"Hmm~?"

**"...You're pushing it."**

"I'm bored."

_"Can't you do something constructive?"_

"Hm...I know!"

**"..."**

"I know a song that gets on everybody's nerves, everybody's nerves, everybody's nerves, I know a song that gets on everybody's nerves and this is how it goes~!"

**"Oh. God. NO."**

_"What's wrong? It's not THAT bad."_

**"Keep saying that to yourself..."**

"I know a song that gets on everybody's nerves, everybody's nerves, everybody's nerves, I know a song that gets on everybody's nerves and this is how it goes~!"

_"Eh?"_

"I know a song that gets on everybody's nerves, everybody's nerves, everybody's nerves, I know a song that gets on everybody's nerves and this is how it goes~!"

**"ShutUp****ShutUp****ShutUp****ShutUp****ShutUp****ShutUp****ShutUp****ShutUp****ShutUp..."**

"Tee hee~ Had enough yet?"

_"Eh? She stopped? B, but I still hear it ringing in my head..."_

**"I told you so."**

_"It...won't stop...her obnoxious voice..."_

"Nani? Who's obnoxious?!"

**"Well, let's see...it can't be Mint, it can't be--**

"Hmph!"

* * *

A/N: It's the song that never ends. It's what your siblings sing when they want to annoy you. It's that annoying song that gets stuck in your head!


	72. How Tiring

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Takes place before you get the Rhea-Birds.

Arche is normal, **Chester is bold. **

* * *

(sigh) "This is so tiring..."

**"What are you complaining about? You're not the one walking!"**

"What, are you jealous?"

**"Hmph. Of you? No."**

"Looks like someone's in den~ial."

**"Keh. At least I'm getting some exercise off of this."**

"So?"

**"You're going to get fat if all you do is sit around on that broom."**

"Hmph! Says who?"

**"Just thought you'd like to know. Keep telling that to yourself. Maybe it won't come true."**

"..."

**"Oh? You're actually setting foot on the GROUND?" **

"Hmph. I'm just doing this out of pity."

**"Whatever you say."**

**

* * *

**


	73. Cless's New Skill

Disclaimer: I own nothing. Except this extremely redundant disclaimer.

Cless is normal, **Arche is bold**, _Chester is italics. _

* * *

Will you buy it for ___gald?

**Cless has learned Ogi ___**

"Demon fang! Swallow kick! Demonic Swallow Kick!"

**"…That's ALL?"**

"Huh?"

**"All you did was put two of your normal attacks together!"**

"Yes…?"

**"We wasted ___gald for that?! Couldn't you figure it out for yourself?!"**

"That's like asking you to make up a spell by yourself! It takes a lot of concentration! You must be vigilant in the training of your spirit and body Then, once you have reached the utmost limits of these two skills, you will be able to draw out the full power of both."

_"Didn't you just plagiarize that line from old man Tristan?"_

**"How? I'm not the one jumping up in the air shouting a random attack name!"**

_"Technically speaking, you're the one who flies and shouts a random spell name while--_

**(Ignoring him) "Concentration to yell and gracefully kick the air?"**

_"Smiling that sadistic smile."_

"Not all of them involve kicking the air..."

**"I bet even the old man could do that!"**

"You mean Klarth?"

**"Well duh, who else?"**

_"You mean the way he book-uppercuts people?"_

**"Yeah, yeah! That!"**

"I don't think Klarth is the type to flip through the air and kick people..."

_"Heh. He'd probably break his back or something first."_

**"But, I'd like to see him try!"**

_"It actually would be pretty amusing if he could pull it off."_

**"Hehe~ Let's go find him!"**

"Y, you two..."

* * *

A/N: *Thinks of Klarth with Cless's skills*

...Book rain! Swallow kick!


	74. A Little Fact

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

This takes place after you've found out about Morrison's Research Institute.

Klarth is normal, **Cless is bold,** _Chester is italics._

* * *

"..."

**"You seem to be really into that book there, Klarth..."**

"It's quite intriguing. Did you know that having two thumbs on one hand is a dominant gene?"

_"Huh?"_

"Do you know what this means?"

_"I think you've lost both of us there..."_

**"So, we're supposed to have two thumbs?"**

"You see, this supports the theory of evolution..."

_"I don't think he's listening..."_

**"...Did you get what he meant?"**

_"Hm...Advanced thumb wars?"_

* * *

A/N: That's about the only thing we talked about in sports med class that didn't involve blood and gore. 


	75. Holding Back

Disclaimer: I don't own this game in any way.

After you've defeated Dhaos in the past.

Klarth is normal,** Cless is bold,** _Arche is italics, _Mint is underlined.

* * *

"Did any one else get the notion that Dhaos was holding back?"

**"Damn him...Is he looking down on us?"**

_"Yeah! If he wanted to kill us, he could've done it a long time ago..."_

"I don't think he wished to truly fight us..."

**"Are you sure about that, Mint?"**

_"Tell us that when he was 'DHAOS LASER' ing our butts back there!"_

"It could've been worse. He could've used it more than once at a time."

"Yes...we should be glad that he let us off easy."

_

* * *

_A/N: Dhaos nearly annihilated me when he used his laser...

Dhaos laser is so abusive in ToW: ND2.


	76. The Talk

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

A/N: Blegh, thanks to Nightshade X- for pointing out the typo. Its fixed now.

Klarth is normal, **Cless is bold,** _Chester is italics. _

* * *

"Cless...Chester and I have decided that you need some...help."

**"Huh? I'm not in any danger..."**

_"Ah, no...it's just that...as your best friend, since your old man is gone..."_

**"...?"**

"We'll get to the point. You need a lesson on women."

**(Blink blink) "...What?"**

_"No offense, but you're kind of..."_

"Dense."

**"...What do you mean?"**

"Well...remember when we went to see the Unicorn?"

**"Yeah, so?"**

"...Do you know what it means to be a 'pure maiden'?"

**"Amo...it means you haven't sinned, right?"**

"Sort of."

_(sigh) "Do you know how babies are born?"_

**"Ah, well there's a stork that..."**

_"...This might take a while."_


	77. My Bad!

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Cless is normal, **Klarth is bold, **_Chester is italics._

* * *

**"Ah!"  
**

"A, ah! My bad."

**(Twitch) "You nearly slit my throat and all you can say is 'My bad'?!"**

"Sorry...?"

**"Sorry for what? Your improper English or carelessly waving your weapon around like that?"**

"I was training..."

_"What improper English? He sounded perfectly fine to me."_

**"Didn't your parents teach you how to speak?"**

"Of course!"

_"Are you insulting us now?"_

**"No. As a scholar, I believe it is my duty to see that you speak properly."**

"..."

**"Now, tell me. What did you mean by 'My bad'?"**

_"Geez, i__s that what this was about?"_

**"Don't take it so lightly."**

"I...agree with Chester on this one."

_"Yeah, as long as you get the point, it's fine, right?"_

**(Anger mark) "Fine?! No, it is most certainly not _fine! _I just don't get it! My bad...what? I mean, if you do something good, do you say, 'my _good?_' "**

"A, ah...m, my bad...mistake?"

**"That's better." (Leaves)**

_"He's lost it..."_

"Hai..."

* * *

A/N: Beware of overly-obsessive English teachers.

* * *


	78. Treat as if Your Own

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Klarth is normal, **Chester is bold**

* * *

**"..."**

"Chester. Are you done with that yet?"

**"Oh, uh...here."**

"...Why are there food smudges all over?"

**"I got kinda hungry, so..."**

(Anger mark) "Is this how you always return another person's belongings?"

**"N, no..."**

"I should hope not! Damn...it's useless now."

**(shrug) "You have another one, don't you?"**

"Cless threw it out."

**(sigh) "What kind of self-respecting man is he..."**

"He didn't seem to appreciate our lesson, either."

* * *

A/N: Don'tcha hate it when people borrow your stuff and return it to you looking like it's mauled or something?

*cough* And if ye didn't guess, Klarth lent Chester his glossy magazine.

* * *


	79. Good Enough to Eat?

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

This plays if you haven't cooked for 50 battles straight and run into a slime type monster.

Arche is normal, **Cless is bold,** _Chester is italics._

_

* * *

_

"Food...I need food..."

_"Ugh...I'm too tired to argue with you on this one..."_

**"Do you two want some gummies?"**

_"Gah! I'm sick of gummies!"_

"Yeah...even that orc jelly looks more delicious than gummies..."

_"...No. Still looks repulsing to me."_

**"Ah...Arche? Are you...all right?"**

"Here, jelly jelly jelly..."

_"I don't blame her...I could use some food right now, too..."_

**"But-**

"JELLY! GET IN MY BELLY!"

**(sweat drop) "Amo...shouldn't we stop her?"**

_"..."_

**"Chester?"**

_"I SAW IT FIRST! Get away from it!"_

**"..."**

**

* * *

**A/N: Neverreally bothered with the cooking system, unless I was really desperate...

And I just wanted to say thanks for the support, guys :)

* * *


	80. The Truth Must Be Told!

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Mint is normal, **Arche is bold**, _Chester is italics. _

* * *

**"Mint! Hey Mint!"**

"Yes?"

**"Uh...I was wondering if...youCouldTeachMeHowToCook."**

"Ah...of course?"

**"Yay~! Thanks, teach!" (heart)**

"...May I ask what brought about this sudden change?"

**"Ah, well y'see..."**

_(Enters) "Geez, you didn't have to get all mad. You said you wanted my honest opinion!"  
_

**(anger mark) "Because of HIM!" (Jabs a finger at Chester)**

"Er..."

_"The truth hurts, doesn't it?"_

**"Shut up!"**

"Perhaps you should be a little more...tactful, Chester?"

_"Tactful? Well, how else can I put 'Your cooking sucks like hell' into nicer terms?"_

**"Hmph! Do you see what I mean?"**

(Sweat drop) "I, I see...Well, you could try saying...ah..."

_"See? There's no other way to put it. Either way, she gets the point."_

**"Well, you don't have to be so blunt about it, Mr. I'm-so-good-at-everything!"**

* * *


	81. Cooking Lessons

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Arche is normal, **Chester is bold**, _Mint is italics._

* * *

"Okay, can we start now, Mint?"

_"Hai. Let's start with something simple."_

"Hm...A sandwich?"

_"That's fine."_

**"It's kind of sad if you need lessons on how to make a sandwich..."**

(Black squiggly) "And what are you doing here?"

**"Just watching. If it helps, I doubt even YOU could screw up a sandwich." **

"Hmph! Well, I- (Accidentally drops bread)

**Cooking failed.**

_"..."_

**"Wow. I stand corrected."**

**

* * *

**A/N: My thanks to frostneko for the inspiration. "The only way to fail at making a sandwich is to drop the bread."

...Or is it?

* * *


	82. Cooking Lessons 2

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Arche is normal, **Chester is bold**, _Mint is italics._

* * *

**(sigh) "You're at it again?"**

"Shut up!"

Bang.

**"What is it THIS time?"**

_"Vegetable salad."_

**"Are you purposely picking recipes that are near impossible to mess up? With the exception of who cooks it, anyway..."**

BANG. BANG!

(anger mark) "..."

_"A, ah Arche...you should cut those a little more gently..."_

**"Yeah, they're coming out all uneven."**

BANG BANG--**  
**

(Turns) "Well, no one asked y-(BANG)--!!"

_"Arche! First Aid!"_

**"Ah, looks like we have to throw that out now."**

_"Amo...Arche...shouldn't you put that down now...?"  
_

**"See you!" (Runs)**

"Get back here!"

* * *

A/N: Don't run around with knives, now.

...Hm, I had some connection error yesterday :/

* * *


	83. Ask the Expert

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Just a commentary on when you talk to the Chef in Edward's house in the future.

The food critic is normal, **Arche is bold, **_Chester is italics,_ Mint is underlined,_** Suzu is bold and italics.**_

* * *

"I am a renowned food critic and can recognize the hidden potential in any cook. Among you, the best cooks are Klarth and Mint."

"I, I'm not that good..."

_**"On the contrary. Your cooking is exquisite."**  
_

_"Yeah, Mint's really the perfect lady."_

"Depending on which person does the cooking, the result can vary greatly."

_(cough) "You can say that again..."_

**(glare) "Are you implying something?"**

"All things considered, Klarth and Mint are the best cooks and can improve their skills quickly..."

"..."

"On the other hand, Arche lacks cooking skills and gaining additional stars will take many more attempts than other characters."

_"Hmph. Listen to the expert!" _

**(Twitch) "How do we know this guy's real?"**

"However, even Arche has certain recipes that she excels at. She is very skilled in dishes that restore TP, in other words, recipes that have 'fruit' in their names."

_"Have you ever tasted it?"_

**"It's perfectly fine!"**

**_"That is..."_**

"As you'd expect, the young ninja is excellent at making traditional Eastern dishes. In reality, Suzu can rapidly master any kind of recipe."

"That's Suzu-chan for you." 

_"And she's only 11. Compared to you..."_

**"Hmph! Suzu is Suzu! That's why!"  
**

"Of course, as with any chef, she has her own area of expertise. However, she will have to overcome adversity to learn how to make Curry and Rice. Those who have witnessed certain events will immediately understand why."

_(Sweat drop) "..."_

_**"...I prefer sweet things..."**_

_"And yet she can still master it faster than XX cook here..."_

* * *


	84. Caught in the Middle

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

If you win a battle with Cless, Chester and Arche close together in your formation.

Cless is normal, **Arche is bold**, _Chester is italics._

_

* * *

_

**"Yatta!"**

"We did it!" (Assuming victory pose)

**"Whoa!"**

_"Yeah!" (Assuming victory pose)  
_

**"Wah!" (falls)**

_"Oomph!"_

"Er...are you two alright?"

**"Gah! You two should watch where you're swinging those!"**

"Eh? Ah..I'm sorry?"

_"Tch. It's your fault for choosing to be in the front lines with us. Shouldn't spell casters stay in the back, anyway?"_

**"What, is there a rule for setting up our battle formations?" **

_"Well, it's common sense. Oh, wait. I forgot you didn't have any."_

**"Says the one who knocked me off my broom!"**

_"Who told you to fly so low?"_

**"I assumed it was SAFE, but I was apparently wrong!"**

_"Yeah, I'm glad you admit to your mistakes."_

**(twitchy smile) "But, of course."**

(blinks) "Did I miss something here?"

* * *

A/N: They look close enough to hit each other in their battle poses...

* * *


	85. Be a Leader

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

This plays if you haven't played as anyone other than Cless for a few battles.

Arche is normal, **Cless is bold,** _Chester is italics_, Klarth is underlined,**_ Suzu is bold and italics. _**

* * *

"You know, I've been wondering...'

_"Yeah, and?"_

"Can't someone other than Cless be leader for the day?"

"Actually, there is a saying that goes "Don't be a follower, be a leader."

**"Eh?"**

"I don't see why not, but..."

_"If you're the one leading, then we're all doomed."_

"Yeah? Well, what about you?"

_"I've known Cless way longer than you have! If he can lead, then so can I!"_

"Hmph. If anyone, I believe that I could lead just as well as Cless."

**(Sweat drop) "Amo...are you guys trying to replace me...?"**

**_"I have not said anything yet..."_**

"Ne, that's because Suzu's on my side!"

_**"...Although, I also believe that I could lead the party. I am the future chief, after all."**_

**(sigh) "Not you, too..."  
**

**

* * *

**A/N: I love playing as Suzu. Ninjas are awesome!

...And giant frogs. I have a strange obsession with frogs. Yeah, you didn't need to know that.

* * *


	86. Last Minute Preparations

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

This plays before you return to the present.

Klarth is normal,** Cless is bold, **_Arche is italics. _

* * *

"Are you sure we have everything we need?"

**"Yeah."**

"Remember, once we go, we can't come back."

**"We're good."**

_"...Can we go already?"_

"Is there anything else that we need to do? Anything at all?"

**"...No, I don't belie--  
**

_"A, ah! Wait! There's something..."_

(sigh) "This isn't the "We beat Dhaos celebration party" idea, is it?"

_"No."_

**"What is it?"**

_"I REALLY have to go...to the bathroom."_

"..."_  
_

**(sweat drop) "We...didn't need to know that..."**

"I suppose that counts..."

* * *


	87. The First Day of Spring

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

A/N: 'Tis the first day of spring. And it's snowing...

Klarth is normal, **Cless is bold**, _Chester is italics,_ Arche is underlined. 

* * *

"...Just a little more..."

**"...um...Klarth?"**

"...Almost..."

_"That's not going to get his attention."_

"What's so great about playing with an egg, anyway?"

(Anger mark) "I am most certainly NOT playing with this egg."

_"You want to enlighten us here, then?"_

**"You seem a little...distracted."**

"Yeah, you look like you're going to murder everything in sight!"

"...Are you familiar with the Vernal Equinox?"

_"Oh yeah...it's the first day of spring, right?"_

"The pull of gravity is supposedly off slightly today."

"Bor~ing."

"I have balanced this egg for as long as I can remember on this very day..."

_(Blink) "Do you have some weird obsession?"_

"He sounds like an old person..."

"And today, of all days I forgot!"

**"Amo...what does this have to do with the egg?"**

_"There's some superstition that says you can balance an egg on its end."_

"I believe I have already proven that it is not a superstition."

"Geez, give it up already! It's just an egg..."

"You don't understand...this will consume me...until..."

_"Ah, he's at it again..."_

_

* * *

_A/N: My teacher has some weird obsession with this...

"But, what if someone knocks it over?"

"Kill them."

The idea? Call it last-minute panic...I'm sort of running out of ideas here.

* * *


	88. No Sense of Direction

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

A/N: Inspiration from a Golden Sun 4-koma I saw.

Cless is normal,** Klarth is bold, **_Arche is italics,_ Mint is underlined. 

_

* * *

_

"Let's see...north is that way, so..."

**"What are you talking about? North is that way." **

_"Geez, you must be going senile! North is THAT way." _

**(anger mark) "Who are you calling senile?!"**

"Amo...how can you three tell...?"

"Instinct. As a swordsman, I have to hone my skills."

**"Well, you must not be doing a very good job at it. I, for one, use common knowledge as a scholar."**

_"Your knowledge is outdated_!"

**"Excuse me?"**

(sigh) "We could always ask for directions..."

_"What kind of heroes ASK for directions?!"_

**"Well, first of all, we have to find PEOPLE first, and that isn't happening until we decide who's right."**

"Um...it appears that all of you are wrong..."

"What?"

"According to the map...North is this way..."

"Oh...right...the map..."

**"Map? What is this 'map' of which you speak?" **

_"Real heroes don't need maps!"_

_

* * *

_A/N: I always had to refer to the map when I was first flying on the Techbirds. Leave it to my horrible sense of direction.

...If we didn't have an overhead view of the map, I'd be screwed.

* * *


	89. A Guilty Conscience

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

This plays if you didn't move the bushbaby in the Toltus inn before it got destroyed.

Cless is normal,** Chester is bold, **_Mint is italics. _

_

* * *

_

"..."

_"Um...is something wrong? You look really troubled."_

**"Is it about Toltus again?"  
**

"..."

**"Look, it wasn't your fault."**

"I know...it's just that..."

**"How many times do I have to tell you?!"**

"No...I just feel guilty for not moving the bushbaby in the inn..."

_"Eh?"_

**"Huh? So?"**

"Well...it was her last request! And I selfishly refused..."

**"When you put it that way..."**

_"Amo...but you didn't know the village was going to get destroyed, right? And I'm sure you two had a good reason..."_

"We were just in a hurry..."

* * *

A/N: Well...I'm considerate enough to give the apple to Ami before the village is destroyed. That's about it for me.

* * *


	90. A Loss of Pride

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Arche is normal, **Chester is bold,** _Klarth is italics._

* * *

**(sigh) "Geez, you're a really heavy sleeper, you know that?"**

(blinks) "Ugh...why does my face hurt?"

_(mumble) "I dunno, it hurts me too."_

**"Ha, good one!"**

"Wha...?! I...I've been dissed by the old man?!"

**"Who'd have thought you had it in you?"**

_"Hmph. Who are you calling old?"  
_

"I can't believe this..."

**"Heh. If it helps, it wasn't from me this time."**

_"Which reminds me...I believe you meant to say 'disrespected,' correct?"_

"Ugh, that couldn't sound more..."

* * *

A/N: If this sounds sort of rushed, it's because I have a lot of work to do. Romeo and Juliet essay...blegh.

* * *


	91. Random Battle

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Klarth is normal, **Arche is bold,** _Cless is italics._

_

* * *

_

_"Yatta!"_

"That strategy was different than what we usually do..."

**"Who cares? As long as we won, right?"**

"Yes, but we could have just as well lost."

_"Ah, well I was just winging it this time..."_

"What?!"

**"Eh...the same thing gets boring, anyway."**

"...The heroes who carry the fate of the world on their shoulders just 'wing it'..."

_(shrug) "It wasn't that bad."_

"It was completely random and hard to follow."

**"Ne, that's why we call them random battles~"**

* * *

A/N: I was sort of winging it in the last chapter...

_

* * *

_

* * *


	92. Look, Don't Touch

Disclaimer: Don't own.

This plays if you run into a stalagmite-like rock in the Morlia Extension. (I forgot what what floor the maze was on. 18? 19?)

Arche is normal, **Klarth is bold **

* * *

"Ow! Ugh...that's it! Fire--

**"DON'T!"**

"Why not? These rocks are annoying me!"

**"What if you happen to miss?!"**

"Hmph. Relax, I'm not going to hit one of us."

**"No! I mean, what if you defile this cave?! It must have taken years for the dwarves to construct this!"**

(black squiggly) "Fine. Then, Cless can just smash thi--

**"I won't allow it! Do you know how long it takes for stalagmites to form?!"**

"Humph! You know, we're the only ones who made it this far, anyway! No one's going to know if the cave is missing a stalagmite or two..."

**"This is valuable research material!"**

"...What?"

**"Just look at this structure..."  
**

"..." (backs away slowly)

**"No, wait...I shouldn't touch it...I might damage the rock..."  
**

* * *

A/N: I think I made him sound a bit...Raine-ish. I wonder why you can't just pickaxe your way past those small rocks blocking the path...


	93. Night Watch

Disclaimer: Don't own.

This plays if you chose to rest when prompted in the Valhalla Plains.

Cless is normal, **Klarth is bold**, _Arche is italics_, Mint is underlined.

* * *

**"It's nightfall already..."**

_"Can we rest here?"_

"Eh? Here?"

"But...we're surrounded by monsters..."

**"The Valhalla Plains aren't exactly the safest place to sleep."  
**

_"Can't we just stick someone on night watch?"_

**"And who might that someone be?"**

"I'll do it..."

"Are you sure? Please don't push yourself..."

"I'll be fine. You guys can rest."

_"You heard the man! Now, if you'll excuse me..."_

**"Hold it. This isn't fair on Cless's part. We'll take shifts."**

_"Why? He seems devoted enough, see?"_

**"...Cless...?"**

"..."(staring off into the distance) **  
**

"Amo...he is quite focused..."

**"Oi, Cless!"**

"..."

_(poke)_

"..." (topples over)

_"Wah! ...That's kind of creepy...who sleeps with their eyes open?!"_

**"Hm. I find it strange that he can sleep in that position..."**

"...I'll take over for Cless, then..."

* * *

A/N: What I find strange is how you can rest for 8 hours in a field ridden with monsters and not get attacked.

...How I managed to sleep with one eye open and one eye closed when I was young is beyond me.


	94. One Year Older

Disclaimer: Don't own.

Klarth is normal, **Arche is bold,** _Cless is italics_, Chester is underlined, _**Suzu is bold and italics.**_

* * *

"...Where is everyone...?"

**(pops up) "Yo!"**

"Gah!" (backs away)

_"Happy birthday, Klarth!"_

"W, what? W-who said it was--

_**"**_**Hehe (heart) Don't deny it~ Mirald told us so!"**

(Black squiggly) "..."

"Congrats, how old are you anyway?"

_**(enters) "It is impolite to ask of someone's age." **_

"Quite..."

_**"You should repect the elderly."**_

"E, elderly?!"

**"Well, yeah! You're middle-aged, right?"**

"I don't recall ever telling you my age!"

_**"Old men smell."**_

_(Sweat drop) "S, suzu..."_

(anger mark) "Did Mirald tell all of you to gang up on me?"

**"Of course."**

"...Cless?"

**"Hmph! What, you don't believe me?"**

_"Um...yes, actually...she even told us to give this to you." (Holds a box)_

"I, is that so? When did she...?"

**"That's a secret."**** (Heart) **

* * *

A/N: Klarth seems to make a big deal that he's 29 and not 30. (shrug) It's only one year off...

...Friends always make a big deal out of everything, don't they? Yep, today is mine too.


	95. Mid Life Crisis

Disclaimer: Don't own.

This plays after you've seen "One Year Older."

Klarth is normal, **Arche is bold**, _Chester is italics. _

* * *

**"Ugh, you're so depressing!"**

"Humph."

**"Geez, what's so bad about being one year older?"**

"Everything!"

_"Hah, if you hadn't reminded him, he'd still have that content look on his face."_

**(Ignoring him) "Like?"**

_"Actually, there's a lot of stuff you can do that you couldn't do before..."_

****WHACK****

**"Oops. My bad." (Innocent smile)**

"Am I the only one who thinks that it just means you're getting one year closer to your death?"

_"...Yeah, pretty much."_

**"Since when were you so pessimistic?"**

"...Then again, you could die at any moment..."

_"...?"_

"Gah! There's still so much research to be done! I can't die now...!" (Exits)

**(Sweat drop) "What just happened here?"**

_"Must be going through his mid-life crisis."_


	96. Same Old Phrase

Disclaimer: Don't own.

This plays if you finish a battle with Cless's health in red, and if he finishes off the last enemy.

Cless is normal, **Arche is bold,** _Klarth is italics, _Chester is underlined, **_Mint is bold and italics. _**

* * *

"Yatta!"

**"Ugh...how can you be 'Yatta'ing like that?" **

_"Indeed...you sound awfully cheery for someone who has sustained that amount of injuries."_

"Did you get hit in the head too hard?"

"Eh? No, I'm fine!"

"You sure about that?"

_**"Yes...it looks very severe..."**_

"I can still fight."

**"You know, it's kind of getting old."**

"What?"

_"Well, one would think that running into battles everyday is tiring." _

**"No, not that!"**

_"Then, what is it?" _

**"I mean, we say the same thing after every battle!"**

"Huh?"

**"We need new catchphrases! Especially Cless!"**

"W, what?"

**"Come on, all you say is one word!" **

"So? All you say is "I won, I won~!"

**"Well, he says it more than all of us put together!"**

_"While that may be true, we have more important matters than coming up with new after-battle quotes."_

**"That's because you barely get to say anything." **

_(Black squiggly) "Humph. I'm merely speaking the truth."_

_

* * *

_A/N: Whether they're poisioned, near death, or just fine, you'll hear the same quote no matter what.


	97. It's Called Magic for a Reason

Disclaimer: Don't own.

This plays if you have the magic pouch and walk into a dungeon.

Cless is normal, _Arche is italics,_ **Chester is bold,** Klarth is underlined.

* * *

**(sigh) "This thing is so fake."**

"What is?"

_"He's been staring at that pouch since we walked in here."_

"The magic pouch?"

**"Yeah. Nothing's coming out of it, though."**

_"That's probably because you're staring at it!"_

**"Well, how would we know if we got something if someone doesn't keep track of it?!"**

"Just forget about it. I found the description to be highly illogical in the first place. The mere concept of a random object appearing out of thin air completely defies the Law of Conservation of Matter."

_"But this is a MAGIC pouch!"_

**"Yeah, science and logic have no meaning when it comes to magic!"**

(anger mark) "I'll have you know that summoning _magic_ required--

"Hey, guys...where'd this stuff come from?"

"..."

**"You were saying?"**

**

* * *

**A/N: Did anyone get that thing to work? I have no idea if I got something or not...


	98. The Magic Words

Disclaimer: Don't own.

This plays if you get the password incorrect for the door in Gnome's cave.

Cless is normal, **Arche is bold,** _Klarth is italics,_ Mint is underlined.

* * *

"Hm...what could the password be?"

**"Maybe if we say the magic words, it'll open?"**

"That might work..."

_"And, pray tell, what magic words do you have in mind?"  
_

"Open sesame!"

**"Abrakadabra!"**

"Please open!"

_"...I...will not question this..."_

**(Black squiggly) "Let's see you come up with something, O smart one!"**

_"PA-SS-WO-RD."_

"I, it opened!"

**"Wait, why didn't you do that in the first place?!"**

_"That was just a lucky guess."_

_

* * *

_A/N: At least, I think the password was password...


	99. One of a Kind

Disclaimer: Don't own.

Chester is normal, **Cless is bold,** _Arche is italics, _Klarth is underlined, 

* * *

(sigh)

**"What's wrong?"**

_"Yeah, you're not even defending yourself, you idiot!"_

"...It's nothing, really."

_"Hmph, when someone says 'it's nothing,' we all know it means something's up!"_

"Exactly."

"Well..."

_"Yeah? Yeah?"_

"It's just that..."

"Please get to the point."

"My name is so...plain!"

**"Your...name?"**

"Humph. Are you disrespecting the name your parents gave you?"

"No, but...compared to everyone else's...I mean, how many Klarths or Cless's are there besides you two?"

_"So, you're saying that we're one of a kind or something like that?"_

"Well, if we're talking about you, then..."

_"What's that supposed to mean?!"_

"Nothing, nothing."

_"Why you...!"_

"Heh. Those two really are one of a kind."


	100. Combo Master

Disclaimer: ...I don't need to tell you this many times that I don't own Tales of Phantasia.

This plays once Cless has gotten the "Combo Master" title, and if Klarth can summon Pluto.

Cless is normal,** Chester is bold,** _Arche is italics_, Klarth is underlined.

* * *

**"So you're a combo master now?"**

"I guess so."

_"Really? Buut, I haven't seen you go past 8 hits by yourself!"_

"Well..."

"Perhaps no one has surpassed that amount?"

_"That's lame." _

**"Yeah, I bet I can ever do THAT many."**

_"You're on!"_

**"Prepare to lose! Hayate!" **

_"Take this! Ice needles!"_

**"...Who won?"  
**

"Technically, both of you lost, since you haven't done past 8 hits."

_"Ehh~ So Cless really is the combo master, then?"_

"Aren't you forgetting someone? I summon thee, Pluto!"

"...11 hits."

**"Looks like we spoke too soon."**

"Quite. That title rightfully belongs to m--

_"Yeah, Pluto's the combo master~!"_

"..."

(Sweat Drop) "Um...but the combo master title is just proof that I own the combo command and combo counter..."

_"Eh? So anyone can get it?"_

"Anyone who has over 400,000 gald...and can get to a deserted island in the middle of nowhere."

**"I suppose that's us..."**


	101. Smitten Girl?

Disclaimer: Don't own.

Suzu is normal, _Arche is italics_, **Mint is bold**.

* * *

_"Hey, Suzu...Do you like Cless?"_

**"Arche...why are you asking her such a thing?"**

"...?"

_"Come on, you can tell us~"_

"I don't particularly dislike him."

**"...Is that so..."**

_" No! That's not what I mean..."_

"I don't follow..."

**"Please pay no mind to her."**

"..."

_"Aww, but aren't you curious too, Mint?"_

**"That is..."**

_"Ne, Suzu...Is there anyone you like-like?"_

"Eh? Um...that is..."

**"..."**

"A secret..."

* * *

A/N: You know Suzu's It's Electric! title? (Or Smitten Girl, I think in the GBA version?) "It was like a flash of lightning and my body shook with excitement. Could this be love?"

I was thinking of when Cless saved her in Volt's cave...when she got electrocuted.


	102. A Lesson Learned the Hard Way

Disclaimer: ...I don't need to tell you this many times that I don't own Tales of Phantasia.

This plays if Suzu uses her replication skill in battle.

Arche is normal, **Suzu is bold,** _Chester is italics,_ Suzu's copy is underlined. 

* * *

"Hey, Suzu! Can you do that trick again?"

**"Trick?"**

_"Don't bug her."_

"Y'know, the one where you made a copy of yourself!"

**"...What for?"**

_"She hasn't given up on her...'quest' to become a ninja."_

"What's with that tone?!"

**"...Consider this training, then..."**

_"What?"_

**"Nipou Utsushimi!"**

"If you can distinguish which one of us is real..."

**"Then we will proceed with your training."**

_(Sweat drop) "Don't encourage her...what if she gets it right?"_

"Ehhh? Really? I accept! Then..."

"...You have 30 seconds. Starting now!"

"W, wha? Where did Suzu go?"

"..."

"Aha! So you must be..."

****WHACK!****

"Wah!"

"Time's up." (poof)

**"Never let your enemies get behind you."**

_"You...never intended to let her win in the first place, did you?"_

"Suzu!"

**"...You shouldn't make bets that you cannot win." **

"Bet? But I didn't..."

**"Furthermore, you were so confident as to winning that you didn't bother to listen to the loser's terms."**

"E, eh?"

_"...Well, good luck with that."_

**

* * *

**A/N: Yeah, I got the "guess with one is real" part from Ouran High School Host Club.


	103. Failed Success

Disclaimer: I don't own this game in any way.

This plays if Arche fails at cooking, but if the party recovers 100% HP from it. (Never happened to me, but it's in a FAQ.)

Chester is normal,** Arche is bold,** _Cless is italics,_ Klarth is underlined.

* * *

"...No thanks."

"I'll pass, too."

**"Hmph! Well, what about you Cless?" (Sweet voice)**

_(Glances at Chester) "uh..."_

"(It was nice knowing you, man!)"

"(You'll be remembered as a hero.)"

"(Yeah, the savior who saved us from her cooking!)"

_"...(Why me...?) Well...here goes!" _

_Thunk!_

"He's too nice for his own good..."

"I'll go get Mint..."

**"Hmph. He's just sleeping!"**

"Who calls falling headfirst to the ground sleeping?!"

**"Look, he's waking up!"**

_"Ugh..."_

"How do y'feel, man?"

_"...I'm fine, actually. I feel better than before."_

**"See? He's fine!" (hearts)**

"(You can tell me the truth.)"

_"...It tasted horrible, but I feel a lot better now! Look, my wounds are all closed up, too."_

**"Wow, I'm better at this than I thought!"**

(Enters) "Mint's coming...oh, you're awake?"

"...I think he hit his head too hard."

_(Sweat drop) "Is it that hard to accept the truth...?"_

_

* * *

_A/N: Sort of like when Arado drinks Kusha's energy drink from Super Robot Taisen.


	104. Caught in the Act

Disclaimer: I don't own this game in any way.

This plays if you left Klarth on the switch to open the door in Dhaos's castle in the past.

Cless is normal, **Arche is bold,** _Mint is italics,_ Klarth is underlined.

* * *

"We're back."

"H, huh? Already?"

**"What's with you? Aren't you bored out of your mind sitting here?"**

_"We are sorry that we took so long..."_

"Not at all..."

**"What's that behind your back?"**

"What's what?"

"Eh? Isn't it just a book?"

**"...Hmph. Then there's nothing to hide, right?"**

"...Well, what did you guys find while you were gone?"

**(Black squiggly) "Don't change the subject!"**

_"Hm? I, isn't that..."_

"Don't get the wrong idea! I...I just found it, that's all."

**"...So, let's see...while we were gone, you were leering and grinning like a pervert at your porn magazines?"**

"Not exactly..."

**"..."**

"I mean...I don't leer and grin like a pervert..."

(Sweat drop) "Klarth..."

_"Is that why you wanted to stay behind...?"_

**"Hmph. I'll stay behind this time. You guys can watch him."**


	105. Klarth's Hat

Disclaimer: I don't own this game in any way.

This plays after the hot spring scene.

Klarth is normal, _Cless is italics_, Chester is underlined, _**Arche is bold and italics.**_

* * *

"Ahh...that was relaxing..."

"You know, this is the first time I've seen you take off your hat." 

_"I've never seen him take it off either since we first met him."  
_

_**"And we've been with him longer than you have!"**_

"Humph. Who says I haven't taken my hat off before?"

_**"I've seen you SLEEP with it on."**_

"And why were you watching me sleep?"

"Hah. Who's the pervert now?"

_**"What?! I just couldn't fall asleep with you snoring that time!"**_

"I don't snore!"

**_"How would you know? Can you hear yourself in your sleep?"_**

(Sweat drop) "You should ask _yourself_ that."

_**"What?"**_

_"Eh? I've never heard Arche sleep-talk."_

(cough) "...Be glad you didn't..."

* * *

A/N: Sorry for not updating for a while...I just can't stand people watching over everything I do. Especially when it's your parents.

Hm...I only remember him taking off his hat when you first meet him and at the hot spring scenes.


	106. To Pull or Not to Pull

Disclaimer: I don't own this game in any way.

This plays before you examine the lever in gnome's cave.

Cless is normal,** Arche is bold,** _Klarth is italics._

* * *

"A lever?"

_"Pull it. There's nothing else we can do."_

**"No way! What if it activates some self-destruct mechanism?"**

_"Why would there be a self-destruct mechanism in a cave inhabited by a spirit?"_

**"Well, why would there be a lever in a cave inhabited by a spirit?"**

_"..."_

**"See?"**

**Alarm goes off**

_"What?!"_

"Ah...I pulled it."

**"Aiee~ It's going to blow up~!"**

_"Don't just stand there! Run!"_

**Gnomelettes inspect the lever**

**"Eh? ...Nothing happened."**

_"...It seems that they're not guarding the door anymore..."_

"Let's go."

**"That's it? An alarm? ...What a rip-off."**

**

* * *

**A/N: You see a big red button in the middle of nowhere. Do you push it?


	107. No Pain, No Gain

Disclaimer: I don't own this game in any way.

This plays when Cless is fighting the ninjas in volt's cave and if he loses.

Arche is normal,** Chester is bold,** _Mint is italics_, Klarth is underlined,_** Cless is bold and italics.**_

* * *

_**"Ugh!"**_

"Ooh. That's gotta hurt..."

_"Um...shouldn't we help him?"_

**"Nah. He'll be fine."**

**_"Gah!"_  
**

"...It looks like he's losing."

**"Hmph. He won't lose to the likes of them."**

"He's losing a lot of blood..."

_"Ah! Look out!"_

_**"Augh! D, damnit..."  
**_

"...He's not moving."

**"Hey, get up..."**

**_"..."_**

**"Cless?"**

**_"..."_**

_"Cless?!"_

_

* * *

_A/N: Needless to say...I got my butt whooped.

You'd think his friends would at least jump in halfway through the battle...I mean, they're just standing there watching him losing horribly.


	108. A Trivial Question

Disclaimer: Don't own.

This plays after you've changed your formation several times with Klarth in your party and lift-off with the Techbirds in between.

Klarth is normal, **Arche is bold**,_ Chester is italics, _Cless is underlined. _  
_

* * *

"Um...so that's Klarth, and..."

"Are you done yet? Let's go already..."

**"What's the rush for?"**

"You've spent how long trying to decide who's going?"

_"Come to think of it...why do you always take that pink techbird?"  
_

"...It's not pink. It's magenta. And it doesn't really matter what color techbird I pick, now does it?"

_"Not really, no. But you've always taken that one instead of blue or green."_

**"Or pink!"**

"...Cless, are you done deciding yet?"

"Eh? Um...no, actually...I'm curious as well..."

"..."

* * *

A/N: Ergh...my apologies for the extremely late update...everyone's been sick at my school for the last few weeks. And yet we still have to go. Even when we're coughing like crazy. Luckily for me, my throat's just sore now.

But, anyway, I just noticed that no matter how many times I've changed the formation and re-lifted off, Klarth always takes the magenta techbird.

(And then Cless takes the blue one, Chester takes the green one, and Mint takes the pink one.)

The only thing I see it relates to is the color of Mirald's hair...(Well, her hair is blue-ish in the PSX version, but it's purple-ish in Narikiri Dungeon 2.) Any other guesses?


	109. The Town of Arlee

Disclaimer: Don't own.

This plays after you've been to the town of Arlee.

Klarth is normal,** Arche is bold,** _Suzu__ is italics._

* * *

"You know, I feel sorry for the people who have to live there..."

**"Yeah! I'd rather live in Freyland than in that freezing place!"**

"Well, that too."

_"Did you have something else in mind, Klarth?"_

"Don't you think it would be inconvenient to be living in a town of eternal darkness?"

**"Eh? ...I guess it would suck to have to go out and shovel snow in the dark all day..."**

_"It is also more convenient for monsters to ambush travelers."_

"This darkness is also somehow connected to Dhaos."

**"Yeah, so if we defeat him, then their problem's solved, right?"**

"Well, not exactly. For one thing, the people here would have to adjust to the sudden change since they've already been accustomed to this for

several years."

**"If I were one of them, I'd never wanna get out of bed~"**

**

* * *

**A/N: Well, if you think about it...if you look out the window every single hour of the day, you'll be greeted by nothing but darkness. I doubt it really matters at what time you sleep. Plus, it's always snowing out there, not to mention freezing.


	110. A Long Way Down

Disclaimer: Don't own.

This plays if you walk across the bridge in the Morlia Extention.

Cless is normal, **Arche is bold,** _Chester is italics,_ Klarth is underlined.

* * *

"...!"

_"Are you sure this is safe...?"_

"It obviously hasn't been used for quite a long time."

**"What, are you guys scared~?"**

"It feels like it's going to collapse..."

"We're simply being cautious."

**"Yep, it is a lo~ng way down..."**

"Hm...it does seem to lead to a deep point in the mine..."

_(Grumble) "Just because you can fly on your broom..."_

**"Oh, so you _are_ scared?"**

"Um...maybe we shouldn't all go at once..."

"I suppose it can't support all of us anyway..."

**"I don't see what you're all worried about! It's fine! See?" *Jumps up and down***

_"!!!" *Runs to the other side*_

"A, Arche...that's dangerous you know..."

_(anger mark) "Are you trying to kill us?!"_

**"It's not collapsing yet, you know~~And besides, how would you know if that piece of rock is sturdy? It looks like the edge of a cliff that'll **

**give in at any second!"**

"Well, she does have a point, you know. We're not going to get any further if we linger here."

* * *

A/N: Those bridges are already sagging under their weight. Not to mention they're really old. You know, I really don't see how they can run around

on those unsteady things, much less fight monsters on them. Come to think of it, aren't that platforms in between the bridges floating in midair?


	111. Lunatics?

Disclaimer: Don't own.

This plays if Klarth summons only Luna for three consecutive battles and you've seen "Arche's Battle Habit."

Klarth is normal, **Cless is bold,** _Arche is italics_, Chester is underlined.

* * *

"Hey, I've been wondering..."

**"?"**

"Didn't you guys have any spirits other than Luna?"

**"Yeah...we have Sylph, Efreet, Undine, Gnome..."**

_"And Gramps!"_

"...She means Maxwell."

"Can't you summon them instead then?"

"Why?"

_"Ah~it's probably because he's weak and can't even hit anything before Luna kills it~"_

(anger mark) "...Well, you know, I'm getting tired of seeing more than one deranged lunatic blasting every enemy to smithereens."

**"...? Deranged lunatic(s)?"  
**

_"Hmph. So you're calling Luna deranged now?"_

"You know perfectly well who I'm talking about."

_"No, I don't. Enlighten me, why don't 'cha?"_

"I don't see anyone else that has that demonic grin of yours."

_(anger mark) "Whatever are you talking about?"  
_

"You know what? I don't think Luna is the problem here..."

_"...?"_

"I think your demented-ness has rubbed off on her."

_"That's not even a word! You're just complaining that you're weak, weakling!"_

* * *

A/N: Thanks to Tales_Lover for the idea! I'm sorry that didn't really explain much but...I guess it's sort of random because he summoned everything but Luna for me :/

_

* * *

_


	112. Rise From The Dead

Disclaimer: Don't own.

This plays if Chester gets KO'd in battle and Arche revives him after wards.

Arche is normal, **Chester is bold.**

* * *

**"Ugh..."**

"So what's it feel like to die?"

**"...What kind of question is that? Painful, what else?"**

"Well, I wasn't weak enough to get knocked out in the middle of a battle, smart one."

**"Is that so?"**

"Of course!"

**"Then why don't you find out for yourself?"**

"Humph. No thanks."

**"Then don't bother asking."**

"Fine. Then, what's it feel like to rise from the dead?"

**"...Ugh. Do I look like a zombie to you?"**

"Yes."

**"Tch...Fine." (walks closer)  
**

"...Eh?" (Waves a holy bottle around) "Wah! Stay away~~~!"

**"Hmph. That's not going to work on me. You'd better run!"**

"No, wait! Take the old man! I'm too young to die~~!"

**"Not happening! I'd rather take y--" **

"AIEEEE~~~!" (runs)

**"...Hmph." (runs after her)**


	113. A Foreboding

Disclaimer: Don't own.

This plays if you get a game over and reload your save data.

Klarth is normal, **Arche is bold**, _Cless is italics, _Mint is underlined. _  
_

* * *

(shudder)

"What's wrong?"

"I just had a foreboding..."

**"Ehh? About what?"**

"About our impending doom."

**(sigh) "Why are you so pessimistic~?"**

"Didn't you feel it too?"

_"Actually, now that you mention it..."_

"..."

**"Hey! You're both acting like it's all gonna be over for us!"**

_"..."_

**"It's just a feeling, right?!"**

"...I suppose so."

**"Right! So stop acting like we're all guaranteed to lose! It's irritating!"**

"I agree with Arche. As long as we try our best, we can't lose, right?"

_"...Yeah."_

"Heh. Perhaps I was just overreacting..."

* * *

A/N: *Sigh* Back to my summer reading assignment...


	114. Fate

Disclaimer: Don't own.

This plays after you've revealed Dhaos's castle in the future.

Klarth is normal, **Arche is bold**, _Cless is italics_, Chester is underlined,_** Mint is bold and italics.**_

* * *

"You know, there's a saying that goes 'Nothing in life is a coincidence, but fate'."

_**"And we were fated to meet."**_

"As we are fated to part ways as well..."

**"...Yeah, but don't look so down! We're still together aren't we?"**

"It's only a matter of time, though..."

_"Yeah...we have to stop Dhaos as soon as possible..."_

_**"After this...we might not see each other again."**_

"...I suppose this is also our fate."

**"...Can't Dhaos wait a little longer? He hasn't attacked us yet anyway!"  
**

_"Yet."_

"...I'm sure we would all like to spend more time together, however...we should do whatever takes priority first. And that, at the moment, is--

"...We won't have any time for it after this though..."**  
**

**"Yeah! And besides, isn't Dhaos the one who's waiting for us to come to him?"**

"..."

**"So let's go somewhere else for now!"**

"I suppose I couldn't convince you otherwise even if I wanted to..."

* * *

A/N: Yeah, I suppose I'm a bit stumped as to what I should write about. But I still have a fair amount of ideas left. Other than that, it's just pure laziness or I haven't really been in the mood.

And if you've recognized that line about fate, yup, it's from xxxHolic. Yuuko is awesome.


	115. Luck

Disclaimer: Don't own.

This plays after you sleep at an inn and Cless's luck stat decreases.

Cless is normal,** Arche is bold,**_ Chester is italics,_ Mint is underlined, _**Klarth is bold and italics. **_

* * *

_**"Cless, watch out!"**_

"Wh--Ugh!" (Ducks)

**_"Are you alright?"_**

"I'm fi-- Ah!" (trips)

_"You okay there?"_

"Yeah...I think so..."

**_"...You seem a bit off today."_**

"...I've been better."

_"Yeah, it could be worse. Like the time when I walked in on you--  
_

"!!" *Clamps hand over Chester's mouth*

_"MMPH?!" (pries hand off)  
_

**(Enters) "Walked in on what~?"  
**

"Nothing! Right, Chester?"

_"...When did you come in here?"_

**"Humph. You guys yell too much."**

"We're sorry."

_**"Cless just woke up on the wrong side of the bed today."**_

_"...That doesn't really make any sense."_

_**"...It's an expression."**_

**"Well, either way, leave it to Mistress Arche~!" **

"Huh?"

**"Hey Mint!"  
**

(Enters) "Yes...?"

***Shoves Cless* "He's all yours!" (heart)**

"Ah!"

"U, um...?"

"Uh..." (sweat drop)

_"...We'll leave you two alone."_

"Eh?!"

* * *

A/N: ...Luck doesn't really have to do anything, does it?


	116. Excessively Rich

Disclaimer: Don't own.

This plays if you have over a million gald.

Arche is normal, **Klarth is bold,** _Chester is italics, _Cless is underlined. 

* * *

"We're rich, we're rich~"

"Yeah, but...what're we going to do with all this gald?"

"Spend it, of course!"

"On what? We don't really need anything..."

"Sure we do!"

_"And by we, you mean you."_

"Well, if no one else wants it..."

**"...Why don't you ask the rest of us before you decide that no one else needs it?"**

"Heh? What do you need it for?

**(Smiles) "Revenge."  
**

"Say what?"

** "Heheh...Well, you know how they say money makes the world go 'round..."**

_"...Have you lost it?"_

"Maybe he's being possessed!"

**(sigh) "Lower your weapons already..."**

"Klarth...?"

**"I was only joking. Seriously speaking, I could use that to fund my institute."**

"That sounds reasonable..."

**"Heh. Besides, I don't need money to wipe the smug grins off of those know-it-all researchers."**

"..."

**"Hmph. They won't be laughing any longer when they're confronted by the summon spirits themselves..."**

(Sweat drop) "..."


	117. A Guilty Conscience 2

Disclaimer: Don't own.

This plays if you examined the bushbaby statue in Miguel's item store and you saw "A Guilty Conscience."

Cless is normal_, Chester is italics, _**Klarth is bold.  
**

* * *

(shudder) "...It's come back to haunt me, hasn't it?"

**"What?"**

_(Sigh) "...He's becoming delusional. Ignore him."  
_

"How? You saw it too."

_"Saw it and moved on."_

**"Saw what, exactly?"**

"..."

**"?"**

"...the bushbaby statue."

**(Sweat drop) "...What did an inanimate object ever do to you?"**

(Shakes head) "No...that's just it! Nothing! It never did anything!"

**"...You're losing me here..."**

"..."

**"...Has he suffered from a traumatizing childhood experience that in some way or another involved bushbabies?"**

_(Sweat drop) "Didn't I tell you to ignore him...?"_

**"Well, one would naturally be concerned if one of their allies appears to be talking to themselves."  
**

_"You could say he's speaking to his conscience."_

**"...Hm. He shouldn't take it upon himself to make it a habit."**

_"Ah, no...he doesn't really talk to himself..."  
_

**"Is that so?"**

_"...He'll be fine. I can tell you that much."_


	118. Sunburn

Disclaimer: Don't own.

This plays if you walk across the continent of Freyland.

Cless is normal, **Arche is bold,** _Klarth is italics,_ Mint is underlined.

* * *

"um...Mint?"

"...Cless?"

**"Hey, Mint...your face is all red..."**

"Eh?"

"Yeah, it is..."

_"You two should look at yourselves..."_

**"Ehh? ...Ah!"**

"..."

_"...I'd suggest you put something on that as soon as we get back to town..."_

**"Easy for you to say...your face is perfectly fine!"**

_"Heh. And you wonder why I kept my hat on..."_

**(Black squiggly) "You sound like you're enjoying this."**

_"Why, not at all."_

* * *

A/N: Sunburns are evil...especially when you forget to put sunblock on. =.=


	119. Valuables

Disclaimer: Don't own.

This plays if you sold the tea cup item obtained from either Aifreed's treasure quest or lower Morlia.

Arche is normal, **Klarth is bold,** _Chester is italics._

* * *

"Wow...I can't believe they offered us THAT much for a tea cup!"

_"Yeah...if it were like that in the present, we could've used that gald for a lot of things..."_

**"Likewise."**

"I bet we could've gotten a better offer somewhere else too..."

**"Ah, well. A saying goes, 'greed can cause one to lose everything'."**

"Yeah, yeah. But the person we sold it to is probably going to sell it somewhere else to make a profit anyway."

**"Perhaps."**

_"...Huh. You know, when we return to our own time, couldn't we just stock up on teacups and sell them later?"_

**"By that time, some of us won't even be around anymore."**

"Then give us your tea cups~!"

**"Hmph. Saying something like that so shamelessly..."**

"Well, it would be bad if they went to waste, right?"

**"...Even if you have to pry them from my cold, dead hands?"**

"Nah. I'll have someone else do that for me."

** "...I'll be sure to haunt you from beyond my grave."**

* * *

A/N: Seriously. If memory serves, you could sell it for over 40K gald. Somewhere around there.


	120. I Never Miss!

Disclaimer: Don't own.

This plays if you set Chester's strategy to "Go Berserk" and he says his victory quote at the end of a battle.

Arche is normal, **Klarth is bold**, _Cless is italics,_ Chester is underlined.

* * *

"Hmph. You never miss, huh?"

"...What's it to you?"

"Oh, nothing~"

**(black squiggly) "Chester. I'd appreciate it if you aimed more carefully."**

_*sweat drop* "Same here..." _

"What's with you two?"

**"It is quite unnerving to have arrows frequently flying in every random direction past our heads."**

_"Yeah. Ah, well...at least no one got hurt, right?"_

"..."

"Mm. You're just mad 'cause he ruined your hat and nearly shaved your head bald."

**"...While my hat isn't in the best condition, I assure you that my head is far from balding."**

"Well, you figure if it's already turning gray..."

**"That is obviously a sign that I'm getting too old for these kinds of experiences."**

* * *

A/N: Considering they're fighting in a straight line...it's amazing how they don't hit each other in the process.


	121. A Slight Slip up

Disclaimer: Don't own.

This plays if you run around on the ice platform in Fenrir's temple.

Cless is normal, **Mint is bold,** _Klarth is italics,_ Chester is underlined, _**Arche is bold and italics.**_

* * *

_**"Hey, I'll race ya to the other side~" (heart)**_

"Keh. You're on!"

"H, hey! Wait up!"

**"Shouldn't we stay together...?"**

_(Sigh) "Don't follow them."_

"Wh---damnit!" (falls)

"Ah!"

"Oof!"

_**"Hehe. You're lo~sing!"**_

"Ugh...get off of me,,,"

"Sorr--whoa!"

"ACK!"

_**(laughing)**_

"This isn't funny!"

_"Isn't it common knowledge that you shouldn't run on ice?"_

(sweat drop) "That's what I was trying to tell him..."

_**"Need some help there?"**_

(Black squiggly) "I can manage just fi---AINEE!" 

*whump*

"Ah...Thanks, Mint."

**"You're welcome."**

**_(Evil smile)_ _*Walks up behind Cless*_**

_(Sigh) "Here, as amusing as I find this, I'd rather not stay here longer than necessary."_

(Grumble) "..."

"Wh--?!"

**"Ah!"**

_"!"_

"Ugh..."

(///) "S, sorry!"

**"N, no it's not your fault..."**

_"Yes, now if you're both done...please get off of my back."_

**"Eh?"**

"...Why do I always end up on the bottom...ugh."

_**"Because--**_

(Black squiggly) "Just help us up."

_**"And?"**_

(Rolls eyes) "...Please."

_**"Hm~ I was thinking something along the lines of "Please, O--**_

"No. Just no."

_(Black squiggly) "ARCHE!"_

_**"Alright, alright! Geez, you have no sense of humor..."**_

(Glare) "I'll get you back for this..."

_**(Smile) "Try me."**_


	122. Damsel in Distress

Disclaimer: Don't own.

This plays if you run away from several battles with ninja type enemies and you lost the battle against the ninjas at Volt's cave.

Cless is normal, **Suzu is bold, **_Chester is italics, _Klarth is underlined.

* * *

**"Why are you running away?"**

"Ah. I just...it doesn't feel right. I mean, they're only fighting us because Dhaos is controlling them, right?"

**"You should not let your emotions get in the way of your duty."**

"Yeah, I know."

_"Are you sure you just don't want to fight them because of that incident at Volt's cave?"_

(Black squiggly) "If you guys weren't just sitting there watching..."

_"We were sure you could've taken them."_

"Aren't we supposed to be a team here?!"

"Well, you're the knight in shining armor, you know."

(sweat drop) "...What?"

"So it's technically your duty to rescue the damsel in distress."

**"...Damsel in distress...? Somehow, I find that insulting."**

"Good. Don't listen to him."

"You wanted an answer."

"...You just didn't want to jump in there yourself."

* * *

A/N: 2 more days until school starts...


	123. Patience is a Virtue

Disclaimer: Don't own.

This plays if you are in the ninja village, have rope in your inventory and have not yet gotten the chest with the copy patch.

Cless is normal, **Klarth is bold**, _Suzu is italics_, Arche is underlined,_** Chester is bold and italics. **_

* * *

"Hey, there's a chest over there..."

"Huh? Where?"

"Near the chickens."

_**"Why don't you go get it for us then?"**_

"...There's no room to land over there, genius."

_**"Sure there is. Just wait for the chickens to move, idiot."**_

"No way! What if they start pecking at my legs?"

_**"It shouldn't be a problem if you just grab it and go."**_

"Easy for you to say! Why can't you get it?"

_**"Do you expect me to jump over the bushes?"**_

"Yeah. I'm sure you can manage it. Or, if you can't, then crash through them."

_(Enters) "Please refrain from causing any damage."  
_

**"We'll try to them keep out of trouble."**

_"...Please do." (Leaves)  
_

_**(Black squiggly) "Why are you grouping me with her?"**_

"Hey, Cless, I have an idea..."

"?"

**"...What are you doing with that rope?"**

**_"Don't tell me you're listening to her..."_**

"It seems like it might work..."

"Hehe. Someone knows a good idea when they hear it!" (Hearts)

**"...I think we should warn Suzu."**

**_(Sweat drop) "We can't just leave him here..."_**

**"You watch them." (Exits)**

_**"Eh? Wait! What am I supposed to--?**_

"All right! One...two...three!"

"Ha!" *Chucks rope*

SQUAWK!

"Um...They look kinda mad..."

"...Eh...?" (Sweating)

_**"You should probably start running."**_

***Klarth **and_ Suzu_ enter*

"Ulp..." (Running across the screen) "H, help!"

**"It seems like we were too late."**

_"...I believe you said you wouldn't cause any trouble...?"_

"Eheh...my bad?"

_**"And here I thought watching him getting chased by boars was hilarious."**_

**"...This is the hero that the fate of the world lies in the hands of?"**

* * *

A/N: Hm...they probably could've used food to lure them out too. Oh well. Those chickens are just as bad as the Alvanista crab. Maybe worse.

...The idea of Cless lasso'ing one just popped in my head somehow.


	124. Curiosity

Disclaimer: Don't own.

This plays if you talked to the apparition in Frezkiel's cathedral and refused his offer.

Arche is normal, **Klarth is bold, **_Chester is italics, _Mint is underlined.

* * *

"Maaan, that guy was creepy. I mean, "Could I interest you in selling your soul for 10,000 gald?"

_(Shudder) "Yeah. Who would agree to that?"_

**"Well, curiosity can get the better of some people."**

_"...And by some people, you mean...?"_

"Yeah, you sound like you want to barge back in there and find out!"

**"Maybe I do."**

_(Backs away) "..."_

(Enters) "Um...Why are you all huddled around over here?"

"Klarth wants to sell his soul to the devil!"

(Surprised) "What? ...Is that true?"

_"Wait...when did we bring the devil into this?"_

"Demon, devil, same idea!"

"U, um...is there something that you wanted? You could have just told us. There's no need to resort to such measures..." 

**(Sweat drop) "Ah, no...you misunderstand..."**

"But what if he wants to be eternally young or something? There's nothing we can do about that."

_"That's true."_

"But..."

**(Black squiggly) "This is getting out of hand. I merely said I was curious."**

"Yeaaah, and that means you want to find out what happens if you agreed to it."

"?"

**"You do realize it was probably trying to sell us something...?"**

"Eh? Really?"

**"Considering it was explaining how fire and ice negate each other, I assume that it might've been something that would aid us."**

"You actually listened to it?"

**"There was no reason not to."**

"Sure there was! I mean, I already know that stuff and I don't need to be told twice."

_"I'm going to have to agree with her on that."_

"See? And what would a ghost want with our gald anyway?"

**"...Hm. I'm curious about that as well." **

* * *

A/N: In the PSX version, there's this ghost in Frezkiel's cathedral (It uses a monster sprite) that talks about how fire and ice cancel each other out and sells you an ice charm at the end of its explanation. And I'm pretty sure it asked you if it could interest you in selling your soul for 10,000 gald. Or maybe it was more...


	125. Pests

Disclaimer: Don't own.

Arche is normal, **Cless is bold,** _Chester is italics, _Klarth is underlined.

* * *

**"Gah!" (Slapping sound)**

_"Ack!" (Moves away)_

**"Damn it! Don't let it get away!"**

_"At least it wasn't flying at your face...UGH! Die already!" (shooting arrows)_

(Arche enters)

"WAH! Watch it!"

_(Black squiggly) "Get out of the way!"_

(Anger mark) "...Insensitive jerk...!"

**"Ha!" (Swings sword)**

(Dodges) "What did I do this time?!"

**"Did I get it?"  
**

_"...OVER THERE!"_

**"Wh-?!" (Jumps back)**

(Confused) "...What's going on?"

(Enters) "That's what I'd like to know..."

_"Heyletmeborrowthatforasec thanks!" *Runs by and grabs book*_

(Annoyed) "OI! What are you..."

*SMACK!*

"..."

_"Alright!"_

**(Sighs) "We...finally did it..."**

"Would you mind returning my book, if you please?"

_"Eh? Oh, right." (Hands it back)_

*Squish*

"...?" 

_(Sweat drop) "You might want to wash your hands..."_

**"Yeah..."**

(Disgusted face) "...I'll thank you not to use my books to squash insects with..."

* * *

A/N: Bugs seem to have an annoying tendency to come zooming at my face from random directions. Ugh.


	126. Dressing Appropriately

Disclaimer: Don't own.

This plays if you're in the town of Frezkiel.

Cless is normal, **Arche is bold,**_ Klarth is italics,_ Chester is underlined,**_ Mint is bold and italics._**

* * *

"Is it just me...or is everyone staring at us...?"

**(Shivering) "H-h-h-uh?" **

"Y-yeah...do we stand out that much?"

_"P, perhaps...ahh, it's cold..." (Shudder)_

"Well, who told you to wear no sleeves?"

_"You two...barely have any yourselves..."_

**"Y-y-you're still worse off t, than us..."**

_"I beg to differ..."_

**"Hmph! I'm p-perfectly f, fine!"**

"Heh. Says you."

*Arguing in the background*

"Um...where are they walking off to?"

_**(Smile) "I'm sure they have their own way of taking their minds off the cold..."**_

(Skeptical) "If you say so..."

_**"Why don't we leave them alone for now?" **_

(Glances back) "...I guess we could catch up later."

*Cless and Mint leave*

**"--And my shoes are all wet too!"**

"That's what snow shoes are for, idiot. You know, normal shoes, snow shoes..."

**"None of us have any snow shoes, oh smart one."  
**

"So that means all of our feet are wet too, so stop complaining!"

**"I said my shoes were wet, not my feet! Don't you have any socks on?!"**

"Of course I do! Here, do you need to see?"

**"Ack!" **

***Backs away slightly*  
**

** "I don't need your foot in my face! ...I bet they smell, too."**

"And yours don't?"

***WHAP***

**(Sticks tongue out) "NYAH!"**

"Why you..." (Bends down to pick up snow)

_"You know, we're drawing up a crowd--_

*WHAP*

_"...I'm too old for this." (Exits)_

**"So it's just us now, huh?"**

"Keh. Bring it!"

(Runs off screen)

"Oh, Klarth. Are you guys done?"

_"Those two are too busy playing in the snow."_

(Sweat drop) "I thought they were cold...?"

_"I'm sure they'll catch a cold later. Which is why I left while I could."  
_

(Back to Arche and Chester)

**(Sneezes) "Ehh...is someone talking about me?"**

"Probably, because I'm sure idiots can't catch colds." 

**"Who's the idiot, huh?"**

**

* * *

**A/N: And they say I'm crazy to be wearing shorts and t-shirts in the winter...

Okay, I probably am, but it wakes me up in the morning.


	127. About the Monster Book

Disclaimer: Don't own.

This plays if you're carried over your monster encyclopedia data on a new game plus and have just met Klarth.

Mint is normal, **Cless is bold,** _Klarth is italics._

* * *

_"Ah. I was wondering where that went."_

"Oh, I'm sorry. I was just looking..."

_"No, it's fine. I just wanted to add the enemy we saw earlier."_

"Huh? But...it's already here..."

_"What...?"_

"Here." (Hands book over)

_"Hah?" (Flipping though pages)_

**(Enters) "Are you done yet?"**

_"This is strange..."_

**"...Klarth?" (moves closer) **

_"...When did I...?"_

**"Isn't that Dhaos?"**

"It is, isn't it? How did you get this information, Klarth?"

_"I'm...not quite sure myself..."_

**"Eh?"**

_"I've never even seen half of these before...and yet, it's all here, in my handwriting..."_

"That is strange, indeed..."

**"Well, you do tend to forget a lot of things when you get older..."**

_(Black Squiggly) "There is no possible way I could have forgotten all of this. There must be another explanation..."_

**(Skeptical look) "Like what?"**

_"Someone's idea of a joke."_

**"And who might that someone be?"**

_"I don't know. But if you look really closely over here, you'll see that the handwriting is slightly different than mine."_

**"...It looks the same to me."**

_"Perhaps. But if you were the one writing this, you would know."_

**"If you say so..." **

* * *

A/N: Well, you'd think they would question how monsters that don't even appear in their era are in the monster book. And I'm sure your handwriting changes once in a while too :/


	128. About the Monster Book 2

Disclaimer: Don't own.

This plays if you've seen "About the Monster Book" and have not yet completed the monster encyclopedia.

Arche is normal, **Klarth is bold.**

* * *

"Hey...why are all these pages blank?"

**"We haven't encountered that particular monster yet. I'll fill it in later."**

"Eh...what if there isn't one?"

**"What do you mean?"**

"You left a lot of pages blank in between these two, so..."

**"...Hm. I've never really thought about that."**

"Huh? Do you just fill this in randomly or something?"

**"Well, no...if I did that, then it wouldn't really be organized."**

"This is organized?"

**"..."**

"...What?"

**"I'll figure something out if it comes down to it."**

* * *

A/N: Eh...maybe its just me, but I don't see how it's supposed to be organized...

And staring at all the blank pages I have in between two monsters makes me wonder how the characters know that the page is meant for another monster...ick. I'm probably getting confusing with my wording.


	129. Gathering Information

Disclaimer: Don't own.

This plays if you have at least 2 magic lens in your inventory.

Arche is normal, **Chester is bold,** _Klarth is italics._

* * *

**"?"**

"..."

*Moving closer*

**(Uncomfortable) "...What are you...doing?"**

***Backing away*  
**

_"Is there something interesting on his face?"_

"...Huh."

**"What?"**

"You're not as weak as I thought you were."

**"...Can you get away from me now then?"**

"Eh? Wait...you carry that much gald on you?"

**"Huh?"**

_(Sweat drop) "What exactly are you using the magic lens for..."_

"Gathering information of course~" (Hearts)

_"For what? There's no one but us here."_

"So? You never know when it'll be useful~."

***Holds up a magic lens* "Arche Klein. Age 16. Titles...Delicate Flower? Yeah, right."**

"Hmph. Chester Barklight. A big, moronic jerk-faced--

**"Also known as a horrible cook--**

"King of Perverts--

**"Deranged serial killer--**

"Fish faced--

**"Old hag--**

"Scrawny weakling--

_(Sigh) "Aren't you two just making these up now..."_

**"--Flat-chested--**

"Why you...!"

_"...It's best not to remain here."_

* * *

A/N: Using a magic lens on yourself...would be a pretty useless feature, but oh well.


	130. Pure Maiden?

Disclaimer: Don't own.

This plays if you have the Unicorn Horn equipped on Mint and you've seen "The Talk."

Suzu is normal, **Chester is bold,** _Cless is italics,_ Mint is underlined, **_Arche is bold and italics, _**_Klarth is italics and underlined._

* * *

"That rod looks very peculiar."

"Oh, this?"

**"Huh. I guess it does. I mean, most rods aren't sharp enough to stab something."**

_"It's a Unicorn's horn."_

"Unicorn?"

**"I've thought that was just a legend too."**

"Um...I've never heard about it before..."

**"Oh. It just goes something like the unicorn will only appear before pure maidens or something..."**

"Pure maiden? ...So as long as your heart isn't corrupted by evil?"

"Um...I'm not really sure..."

_(Turns around) "..." (///)_

**(Glances at Cless) "..."**

**_(Enters) "Heyy~ what're you two doing?"_**

"...It is rude to turn your backs on people..."

_"S, sorry."_

**_"What'cha talking about? Your face looks rea~lly red!"_**

_"I...um..."_

"...? We were talking about the unicorn."

**_"Eh? That doesn't explain why...oh, wait." (Sweat drop)_**

**(Cough) "..."**

"Arche?"

**_"Eheh...nothing, nothing~" _**

"...All of you are acting funny."

"Is there something we should know?"

_"N, no! It's nothing!"_

**"You'll find out when you're older."**

"I...see." (Exits)

"…" (Exits)

**_"...That was close."_**

_"On the contrary, your faces were quite amusing."_

_"H, hey…you were here the whole time and you didn't help us?"_

_"Silence is golden."_

**_"Since when are you silent?"_**

_"Hm? Well, while we're on the topic of the unicorn…did Cless figure out why Arche couldn't see it?"_

_**"H, hey!"**  
_

**"Because she's secretly a guy in disguise?"**

_"Huh?"_

**_"It's not something you need to know!"_**

**"Ah, so you are admitting that you're a guy?"**

_(///) "…O, oh..." _

**_"H, hmph!" (Exits)_**

**"...Huh. Is something wrong with her?**** Or is that all she can come up with?**" (Exits)

_(Sweat drop) "...And here I thought Cless was dense."_

* * *

A/N: Thanks to WildfireDreams for the idea! Hope ya enjoyed it...


	131. Hat Troubles

Disclaimer: Don't own.

This plays if you are in an armory.

Cless is normal, **Arche is bold,** _Klarth is italics, _Mint is underlined._  
_

* * *

"We should get some new equipment while we're here."

_"Agreed."_

**"I'm going over there."**

"...I'll be with Arche."

"Alright."

_"Hm..."_

"Did you find something?"

_"I suppose."_

"...You're looking for a new hat?"

_"Regrettably, mine doesn't offer much protection." _

"So you're not going to wear it?"

_"Well, no...it just wouldn't feel right if I kept it off. It's like how you always wear that bandanna all the time."  
_

"...I guess I could relate to that."

**"Hey, are you two done yet~?"**

_"No. Why, are you?"_

**"Eh. Mint's still looking around."**

_"Exactly. It hasn't even been that long either."_

**(Sigh) "This is sooo boring..."**

_"Then go do something constructive."_

**"Like..."**

"You could help Klarth with his hat problem."

**"...Hat problem?"**

_"I don't need help."_

**"Hm...he could always wear a ribbon instead."**

_(Black squiggly) "Maybe Mint could pull that off, but I'd rather not attract unwanted attention."_

**"Well, your hat would cover it up anyway, soo..."**

_"No. __ And I highly doubt a ribbon would be able to protect my head."_

**"Fine then. How about..."**

_"Wait...I think you were on to something..."_

**"Heh? Really?"**

_"There."_

**"..."**

(Sweat drop) "I guess that works..."

**"At least the ribbon would've fit under your hat..."  
**

_"Are you going to give up on that yet?"_

**"Hm..."**

"Is everyone done?"

"Yeah, it looks like it."

**"Finally! Let's go!" (Exits)  
**

"...I guess she was just bored."

_"Perhaps, but I can't tell whether she was serious about that or not."_

"...Maybe you should find a smaller hat though."

_(Sigh) "I'll manage."_

* * *

A/N: I was just wondering how Klarth could equip another hat on while still wearing his own :/ And yet, he can't seem to equip any gloves on...


	132. Miscommunication

Disclaimer: Don't own.

This plays if Arche is in your party and gets hit with a water elemental spell.

Arche is normal, **Chester is bold, **_Klarth is italics_, Suzu is underlined.**  
**

* * *

"Ugh! This is so annoying!"

**"It's just a little water. Get over it."**

"Are you kidding me? Do you know how LONG it takes for my hair to dry?!"

**"Walking around with wet hair all day isn't going to kill you..."**

_"Actually, it would if she was in some place like Frezkiel."_

**"Then she can go sit in Freyland until her hair dries."**

"Si~gh...that's just going to make it all frizzy."

**"Cast a fire storm spell?"**

_"Hair catches fire very easily, you know..."_

**"Not if she's careful. But then again..."**

(Annoyed) "Fire Ball!"

**(Dodges) "Yep, I don't think that would work if she's the one doing it."  
**

_"...Chester...look behind you."_

**"Eh? Ack!" (Starts running around)**

_(Sigh) "...Undine!"_

**"...ugh."**

"Now you know how I feel."

**(Black squiggly) "An eye for an eye, huh? Hell Pyre!"**

(Moves away) "Hmph! Fire Ball!"

**"HELL PYRE!"**

"FIRE BALL!"

_"...Are you two trying to sear each other's hair off?"_

(Enters) "I heard shouting...are we being attacked?"

_"...False alarm."_

"Ack!"

"...Why are they attacking each other? Shouldn't we be cooperating?"

_"Hm...it's hard to explain. Think of it as...their way of expressing their feelings."_

"...So...this is a form of communication?"

_"You could say that."_

"...I still don't get how this works."

_(Sweat drop) "Maybe you'll understand when you're older?"_

"...Perhaps if I tried it out myself..."

_"Eh?"_

(Runs off screen)

_"...I wonder what she meant by that..."  
_

_

* * *

_A/N: *Sigh* ...Long hair is more trouble than it's worth. But, then again, you're not going to see me cutting mine anytime soon...


	133. Miscommunication 2

Disclaimer: Don't own.

Klarth is normal, **Cless is bold,** _Mint is italics,_ Suzu is underlined.

* * *

"Have any of you seen Suzu?"

_"She's over there with Cless. Is something wrong?"_

"Ah. Well you see--

"Bring it on!"

**"Tch...Rising Phoenix!"  
**

"Hiyah!"

**"?!"**

"...I pity you."

**"Heh...I was careless..."**

"Looks like I got here too late..."

_"Hm? This _was_ very sudden..."_

"That's probably my fault..."

_"...so how did you know they were going to spar?"_

"Eh?"

_"Suzu just came up to Cless and asked if he wanted to spar with her."_

"...Huh."

_"Here they come."_

**"So, what did you think?"**

"It was fun."

**"Let's do it again some time."**

"Yeah."

**"Oh, Klarth. When did you get here?"**

"Just passing by."

_"Weren't you looking for Suzu earlier?"_

"No, it's...never mind."

"Hm?"

"That reminds me...I do believe I just left Arche and Chester in the middle of killing each other..."

**"They're at it again?"  
**

_"I'll go check up on them..."_

**"I'd better come too." **

_**(Exits) **_**  
**

"...Shouldn't we leave both of them alone?"

"That would be a bad idea."

"But aren't they communicating with each other?"

"...It's too early to say anything for sure."

* * *

A/N: Really need to learn how to break my procrastination habit...


	134. Girl Talk

Disclaimer: Don't own.

Arche is normal, **Suzu is bold,** _Mint is italics, _Chester is underlined.

* * *

"Hehe~ looks like we're all here!"

"(Huh? What're they doing here...?)" *ducks out of sight*

_"What did you call us here for?"_

"I just thought we could have a little talk, you know?"

**"Talk?"**

_"About what?"_

"Girl stuff!"

"(This could get interesting...)"

**"...?"**

"You know~

**(Blank look) "..."**

(sweat drop)

"Maaan, you've really been missing out on a lot..."

**"..."**

"Si~gh...I'll start then! Sooo...you guys have any deep, dark secrets you want to share?"

**"...If this counts, then..."  
**

"Hm? What was that?"

"(...I can barely hear anything...)"

"Rea~lly? That doesn't sound like something you would do...Ah, no offense!"

_"But I think Suzu would look cute like that..."_

"Hey, what about you, Mint?"

_"Eh...well..."_

"(If I get any closer, I'll be seen...)"

"Whoa...eheh...remind me never to get you mad..."

**"Yes..."**

_(Smile) "It wasn't that bad..."_

"You're kind of creeping me out here..."

_(Tilts head) "Am I?"_

(Backs away) "Something tells me I did something to get on your bad side...heh heh..."

_"I don't know. Did you?"_

"No...?"

_"Then you're fine."_

**"...Appearances can be deceiving." **

_"Hm? Did you say something?"_

**"..."**

"Well, I guess I can tell you guys this...just you two anyway..."

_"..."_

"You see..."

"(...Is she...blushing?)"

"So then...well, you know..."

_"Ehh...really?"_

"It's all in the past now, anyway..."

_"I suppose..."_

"Hey, I've been wondering..."

_"Yes?"_

"What do you look for in a guy?"

**"I don't really..."  
**

"Well, for future reference..." (heart)

**"...That sounds rather suspicious."**

"Ah, well, if you want, I'll go first..."

**"..."**

"For one thing, he has to be cute!"

"(Hmph.)"

"And nice, I guess..."

**"You sound unsure..."**

"Well, I mean...I guess I don't mind...if they're jerks...?"

"(...)"

_(smile) "Even if they're "perverted jerks" ?"_

"Er..."

**"...That are hiding behind that thing over there?"**

"(Ack!)"

"Huh?!"


	135. Requiem

Disclaimer: Don't own.

This plays if you have the requiem book equipped on Klarth.

Cless is normal,** Arche is bold,**_ Klarth is italics,_ Mint is underlined.

* * *

"Cless! Behind you!"

_"A sail, a sail!"_

"What? A sa--ck!" (Gets hit)

"First aid!"

**"...You need to get your eyes checked, old man. Ice needles!"**

_"What noise is this? Give me my long sword, ho!"_

**(Black squiggly) "Um, it's obviously a battle, and since when do you use swords?!" **

"Aren't you two going to help? Demon Fang!"

_"Your lives shall pay the forfeit of the peace!"_

**"Took you long enough...but what's with that cheesy line?"**

_"Dost thou not laugh?" _

**"...Well..."**

_"You love me not."_

**(Sweat drop) "Eh? Alright, alright, I'm laughing...are you happy now?"  
**

_"Get you hence, sirrah. Saucy fellow, hence!"_

**"Saucy fellow...? Who talks like that anymore?"**

_"It is my lady. Oh, it is my love. Oh, that she knew she were!"_

**"W, what's with the intense stare?"**

_"Oh, that I were a glove upon that hand that I might touch that cheek!"_

**"H, huh? Are you out of your mind?!"**

"Arche, what are you screaming about?"

"Yeah...the battle's already over."

**(///) "I...well...Why don't you ask him?!" **

_"MAXWELL!"_

**"..."**

_"...Oh? It's already over?"_

(Sigh) "You couldn't have done that earlier?"

_"It's not my fault some chants are ridiculously long..."_

**"What? That was...a chant?"**

_"Hm? Wasn't it obvious?"_

**(Black squiggly) "...Ugh."  
**

_"...?"_

* * *

A/N: Apparently the Requiem disguises spells as dramatic plays. That's what it says in the description, anyway. Though I don't really see how that

fits its definition...

As for the lines, the only plays I've read/been forced to read are Romeo and Juliet and Julius Caesar.


	136. Paper Cut

Disclaimer: Don't own.

Arche is normal, **Chester is bold, **_Suzu is italics. _**  
**

* * *

"Ow! rrgh..."

_"?"_

"Paper cut."

_"Ah."_

"Ugh...I hate these things."

_"It will heal soon."_

"And when's soon?"

**"You could always stick a lemon gel on it if you're that desperate."**

"Wouldn't that sting?"

**"Well, if you feel the burn, then you know it's working." **

"...Yeah, no thanks."

_"I wonder..."_

"Hm?"

_"Does Klarth ever get any paper cuts?"_

"Huh? I don't think so...Why?"

_"He always seems to be reading those books...even in battle."_

"Hm...if he did, then I don't remember."

**"Somehow, I can't really imagine him paper-cutting himself in the middle of a battle."**

_"It could happen."_

* * *

A/N: Just randomly popped into my head while I was pulling my books out of my backpack. And somehow getting a paper cut in the process.


	137. Merely a Coincidence?

Disclaimer: Don't own.

Plays after you've seen "Paper cut."

Klarth is normal, **Arche is bold,** _Chester is italics,_ Suzu is underlined.

* * *

**"Okay. Let's go!"**

"Hiyah!"

"..." (Summoning)

_"Ha! Haa! Take this!"_

"Raiden!"

"..."

**"Fire ball!"**

"I summon thee..."

"Watch out!"

"...Come, Sy--ugh!"

"Klarth!"

(Black squiggly) "That's it!"

*Whack*

_(Sweat drop) "Well, that's one way to do it..."_

"Are you alright?"

(sigh) "Nothing worth worrying over."

**"You know...you seem really pissed off right now."**

"It's nothing. Just some bad luck lately."

**"Like?"**

"...Recently, I seem to be prone to paper cuts. It's getting quite annoying."

**"I, is that so...?"**

"Hm. This is the first time it's happened, actually."

**"Eheh...maybe you should take a break. Too much stress is bad for you, afterall~"**

"Perhaps. I suppose I have been stressed out these past few days...I guess I'll take some time off."

**"You do that."**

"Wish me luck."

**"Umm...break a leg."**

(Exit)

**"..."**

_"Huh. What do you know..."_

"It actually happened."

_"Yeah...we were talking about it just a few days ago, too..."_

"Didn't he say this started happening a few days ago as well?"

**"It's almost like we jinxed him!"**

_"Haha...I don't doubt that."_

"Hm...but just a few minutes ago, you told him to break a leg."

**(Sweat drop) "It means good luck!"**

_"I don't think Klarth's clumsy enough to get his leg broken..."_

"..."

_"..."_

**"...Naaah, it won't happen."**

_"It was probably just a coincidence before."_

"Maybe."


	138. A Rude Awakening

Disclaimer: Don't own.

This plays after you sleep at an inn and you have the drum set in your inventory.

Arche is normal, **Chester is bold, **_Klarth is italics._**  
**

* * *

**"Hey, wake up already."**

"Unn...Five more minutes..."

**"..."**

_"You said that five minutes ago."_

"...Why are you up so early?"

_"The early bird catches the worm."_

"There'll be other worms..." (mumble)

(_sigh) "...Actually, I suppose a few more minutes couldn't hurt..." (Yawn)_

*Clashing/banging noises*

_"Ah! I'm awake, I'm awake!"  
_

"What the hell?!"

**"Rise and shine."**

"Ugh!" (scowl)

_"...How are you allowed to play that in here?"  
_

**"There's nothing that says I can't."**

"...Why do we have a drum set with us in the first place? It's not like we have time to play it anyway..."

**"And what's it look like I'm doing?"  
**

"Disrupting people from much needed sleep."

_"Everyone else is awake, actually."_

(Black squiggly) "Yeah, yeah. I'm getting up."

_"...Still, there really is no practical use for this, is there?"_

**"No, but it's pretty fun to have around."**

**

* * *

**A/N: *Opens up inventory in a random place* Huh. *Selects drum set and starts mashing random buttons* ...Okay, moving on.


	139. A Sticky Situation

Disclaimer: Don't own.

Arche is normal, **Suzu is bold, **_Klarth is italics._**  
**

* * *

"Hey, hand me a gel, would you?"

**"Ah? ..."**

"What?"

**"I don't think you'll want it."**

"Why not?"

**"It's, well..."  
**

(Sweat drop) "Oh. Um...you might want to wash your hands..."

**"...Hm?"**

"Okay...I guess that works too."

_"That's rather...unhygienic."_

**"It tastes funny..."**

_"You do know that there are millions of germs on your hands, right?"_

**"My hands are clean."**

_(sigh) "Don't blame me if you end up getting sick..."_

**"I won't."**

_"Well...just refrain from touching anything." (Exits)_

**"...I didn't think gels could melt..."  
**

"Still, you probably shouldn't be licking your fingers..."

**"It's better than having sticky hands."**


	140. Wandering the Plains

Disclaimer: Don't own.

This plays if you're in the Valhalla Plains and have spent too much time getting to Ishrantu.

Cless is normal, **Klarth is bold,** _Mint is italics, _Arche is underlined._  
_

* * *

"Huh. Did we pass this place before?"

**"I honestly have no idea."**

_"The other teams have surely made it there by now..."_

"Well, this sucks."

**"Agreed."**

_"Should we just return to Migard?"_

**"That depends if we can even find our way back. And besides, we should still meet up with the other teams first."**

"Sigh...so how do we plan on doing that?"

**"Well..."**

"Heh~ I wonder if it would've worked if we left a trail of bread crumbs..."

_"I think the monsters would have eaten them."_

"Nah, I doubt these guys would eat bread crumbs."

_"Then what would they eat?"_

"I dunno...people?"

_"...Really?"_

"I'm pretty sure some of them bite. And they aim for the face, too."

_"..."_

**"What do you two think?"**

"Huh?"

"You figure Dhaos's castle is to the northeast...so we're just going to keep going in that direction."

_"It sounds reasonable."_

"If that's the only plan we've got..."

**"Well, let's go then."**

"Right. Northeast is...that way?"

**"...Isn't that the way we came from?"**

"Is it?"

**"Ah..."**

"...That doesn't help at all."

_"It looks like we're back to where we started..."_


	141. Motormouths

Disclaimer: Don't own.

This plays if you have a mystic symbol equipped on Arche, Klarth and Mint.

Arche is normal, **Klarth is bold**, _Mint it italics,_ Chester is underlined, _**Cless is bold and italics.**_

* * *

*Speaking faster than normal* "Hey have you guys noticed anything strange?"

"Huh?"

***"Hm. Now that I think about it, my jaw aches."**

"What?"

_*"No I feel fine."_

*"Huh...I could have sworn that something didn't feel right..."

***"It's probably just us."**

_*"Is there something wrong Chester?"_

"Can you guys...slow down?"

*"But this is more fun!"

"...You sound like a chipmunk."

"Hmph. You're just jealous that you can't use it."

"It's not like equipping a mystic symbol would help me."

**"True. Well, unless you decide to become a salesperson."**

"He's certainly annoying enough~"

"I'd like to see one of you pull that off."

**"And who might the victim be?"**

**_(Enters) "Ah. Have you seen--_**

"That works."

**_"Eh?"_**

***"Alright. Then...Cless, how would you like to purchase this fine magazine right here?"**

**_"What?"_**

***"Well, say no more! With--**

_"...Eh? Isn't that the..."_

***"--Only 999 Gald! That's right, only yours for 999 Gald!"**

**_"Um--"_**

***"Rendered speechless, I see! Here you go, my good man! No refunds allowed."**

"My turn! Hey, Cless!"

**_"Wh--"_**

*"Are you having trouble with your love life? Then you've come to the right place! Here!"

**_"Ack!"_**

*"This Miracle Charm will make you irresistible! Just spray it on and witness a lovely transformation~!" (heart)

**_(Sweat drop) "..."_**

*"Side effects may include but are not limited to: itchiness, burning, dry eyes...And many more! But, you'll but it anyway! Right?"

**_"I--_**

"Well, thank you for your purchase! I promise you won't regret it!"

**_"Hold on_**--

_"Cless!"_

**_"Not you too..."_**

_"Is this what you were looking for?"_

**_"Oh. Thanks."_**

_*"And now--_

_**"Sorry!" (Exits)**_

_"Ah."  
_

"I think you guys scared him off..."

**"He should have escaped earlier while he had the chance."**

* * *

A/N: There was a skill called "Motormouth" in ToW: ND2 that sped up spell casting, and was acquired from the merchant costume, if you get what I mean.


	142. Watch What You Eat

Disclaimer: Don't own.

This plays if you fight a tree-type monster and receive an apple as a drop.

Cless is normal, _Klarth is italics.__  
_

* * *

"Ah, I could use something to eat..."

_"Wait. Are you sure you want to eat that?"_

*chomp* "Eh?"

_"You don't know whether that thing is poisonous or not..."_

"It looked fine to me..."

_"Are you forgetting that the enemy was using that as a weapon?"_

"...How could I forget a rabid tree madly flinging apples at my face?"

_"Exactly. Besides, considering the conditions, it could have been bug infested."_

"Ugh! Ptew!" (spitting it out)

_"...Surely you must have known that."_

"It...has a worm in it..."

_"Precisely my point."_

"Ugh. I think I've lost my appetite."

_"Well, it could have been worse. Besides, worms are high in nutrients. So technically, it wouldn't have been bad if you had consumed it..."_

"..."

* * *

A/N: ...Has lost all interest in apples. Not actually sure if the former line is true or not, but that's what my mom said when my dad bit into a worm infested apple... :/


	143. Holy Shmoley

Disclaimer: Don't own.

This plays if you buy a holy sword.

Cless is normal, _Klarth is italics,_ **Chester is bold.**

* * *

"'A sword blessed by the gods,' huh."

_"...Though I don't know much in the area of swords, I'm still saying that you were, as they say, jipped."_

**"Correction: As they used to say."**

_"It doesn't matter as long as you get what I mean."_

"...And what exactly do you mean?"

_"You expect me to believe that these shops have an infinite number of supposedly 'blessed' swords from the gods?"_

**"Well, there's also holy symbols, holy bottles, holy shields, holy cloaks...so why not holy swords?"**

_"I fail to see your logic. For one thing, I do not recall any holy helmets or holy gloves to go with that."_

**"I never said there were any."**

"..."

_"No, but there might as well be other holy stuff as well. And also, holy armor."_

**"Oh? I'm pretty sure there IS holy armor."**

_"Really now...I don't recall. And I have everything recorded when it comes to the collector's book."_

**"Just take any armor you have...and make some holes in it! And there you have it! Hole-y armor!"**

_"..."_

"Ah, that's true!"

_"Again, your logic...is confounding."_

_

* * *

_A/N: Star Ocean and item creation. Good 'ol holey armor. And wimpy swords.


	144. Price Check

Disclaimer: Don't own.

This plays if you enter a weapon shop.

Klarth is normal, **Cless is bold,** _Chester is italics._

* * *

**"We're done here."**

"That was fast..."

_"Eh. There's not much to look at."_

"Is that so?"

_"See for yourself."_

**"Our weapons are already better, so there's no point, really."**

"How can you tell?"

**"Isn't it obvious?"**

"...Is there something I'm overlooking? These swords seem to be of high quality..."

_"The price tag."_

"Price tag?"

_"Don't you generally buy the most expensive stuff you see?" _

"...Surely that's not the only thing you look at..."

_"Actually, it kind of is..."_

"..."

_"What's with that look?"_

"And how do you know you're not getting ripped off?"

**"Our intuition has been right so far."**

_"Plus, it looks like the price is the same at every store."_

"I doubt that way of thinking applies everywhere else..."

**"...Is there something else we should be looking for?"**

"Never mind."


	145. Flying Pests

Disclaimer: Don't own.

This plays if you run away from dragon fly, bird, bee, and harpy type monsters.

Arche is normal, _Chester is italics,_ **Cless is bold, **Klarth is underlined.

* * *

"I hate...giant...bugs."

"Agreed. They're bad enough when they're at their normal size."

_"They're not that bad. Compared to a swarm of harpies trying to claw your eyes out."_

**"No. Compared to a swarm of small birds trying to headbutt you."**

"...I'd rather take the birds then bugs or harpies."

**"Have you ever tried going into the Forest of Spirits alone?"**

"No. The only time I've gone there is with all of you."

**"The first few steps you take, you get ambushed."**

"..."

**"And it's not just them you have to worry about. They team up on you with killer bees."**

"..."

**"Not only that, but you also have to watch out for arrows flying over your head."**

"What?"

_"Ack. I keep telling you, that was an accident..."_

**"And if you try to run, there's no escape. And-**

(sweat drop) "I think we get the point."

_(Black squiggly) "You left me to guard while we were running. And almost left me behind."_

**"At least you weren't the one who got knocked out..."  
**

_"Yeah? And who was the one who had to drag you back to the village? While getting chased by all those monsters?"_

**"Last I remember--  
**

"You know...bees are bugs too."

**"Er..."**

_"That was random."_

"True."

"So...we all agree that we hate giant flying bugs?"

**"...And birds."**

"How about flying monsters in general?"

_"Can't argue with that."_  
**

* * *

**

A/N: I seem to have a grudge against flying monsters. Especially the small targets. Run, jump, whack, run back, run again, jump, get knocked down, run back...


	146. Safety Precaution

Disclaimer: Don't own.

This plays if you're in the chief's house in the ninja village.

Chester is normal, **Cless is bold, **_Suzu is italics._

* * *

**(sigh) "Were all those traps really necessary?"**

_"It is a precaution to prevent intruders."_

"Well, sure, but you could just lock the door..."

_"..."_

"Ah. Right. Sliding doors."

**"But, still. The only people who know about this place are your people and us, so..."**

_"__Our people brainwashed by Dhaos."_

**"Oh."**

"...So you think you're going to get ambushed in your sleep?"

_"...Not really."_

**"Then there's really no point, is there..."  
**

"Hm...Hey, Cless. What would you think if I installed some traps in my house when we rebuild Toltus?"

**"...Why?"**

"Do I need a reason?"

**(sweat drop) "...I think I wouldn't set foot in your house?"**

"Then who's going to test it out for me?"

**"..."**

"...Just kidding."


	147. Jiraiya

Disclaimer: Don't own.

This plays after Suzu learns Summon: Jiraiya.

Suzu is normal, **Chester is bold,** _Arche is italics._

* * *

"Jiraiya!"

_"It's...!"_

**"A giant frog."**

"Toad."

**"Right. Well...it doesn't look very...menacing."**

*Fire breath*

**"Whoa!"**

_"Ehh~ It breathes fire too?"_

*Poof*

_"Ah. It's gone."_

**"...Can't say I'm too fond of it."**

_"It was kind of cute, actually..."_

**(Sweat drop) "What?"**

_"Hm? What's what?"_

"You didn't think he was cute?"

**"Well, er...it's a fr...toad."**

"...And?"

**"Somehow, when I look at it, it reminds me of a bigfoot..."**

_"Huh? How?"_

**"I dunno...it looks like it could hop around and squish everything in sight." **_  
_

"..."

_"Ack! Is that a bug?"_

"...! Jiraiya!"

**"That's definitely overkill..."**


	148. In An Alternate Universe

Disclaimer: Don't own.

Arche is normal, **Chester is bold,** _Klarth is italics._

* * *

"Hey, you guys ever wonder what it would be like in some alternate universe?"

_"As in..."_

"Liike...maybe, if we were evil and tried to take over the world?"

**"No, but it sounds interesting..."**

_"I'd rather not."_**  
**

"Use your imagination~"

_"Hm. I don't recall having any. Now if you'll excuse me..."_

_(Exit) _

"...Spoil sport."_  
_

**"Well, what do you think Klarth could be?" **

"Hmm...Maybe the psycho mad scientist who went crazy in the pursuit of knowledge?"

**"That sounds about right."  
**

"Suzu...I bet she could be an evil child genius!"

**"Who looks innocent but is actually pure evil..."**

"With her army of ninjas..."

**"And a giant pet frog guarding her..."**

"...She'll eat you alive!"

**"Yea--wait, what?"**

"Eheh...couldn't think of anything else."

**"Uh...right. Then Mint would be..."  
**

"Someone who's pretending to be good but is actually evil. And smiles a lot." **  
**

**"Cless would probably be her really strong loyal knight or something."**

"That doesn't really sound evil..."

**"Ah, he could be one of those honorable evil guys who tell people to get stronger after defeating them with one hit."**

"I guess it fits."

**"So what would you be?"**

"Me? An evil enchantress~"

**"That looks into mirrors on the wall and sends people poisoned cooking?"**

"...Isn't that the witch from Snow White?"

**"...Maybe."**

"Hmph. Well, then you'd be the person gone pyscho trying to revive his dead sister."

**"Huh. Why does that sound familiar..."**

"That's everyone, right?"

**"What about Dhaos?"**

"Well...if we're the villains...then wouldn't that make him the hero?"

**"Dhaos trying to save his world from the likes of us...kind of hard to imagine."**


	149. What's In a Name?

Disclaimer: Don't own.

Arche is normal, **Cless is bold,** _Chester is italics, _Klarth is underlined.

* * *

_"I've got you now! Thunder Blitz!"_

**"Demon Fang!"**

"...Do they have to shout out the names of their attacks?"

"Don't we all?"

**"Tiger blade!"**

"I guess."

_"Sonic bash!"_

"I wonder how they come up with names for these..."

"At least they're original."

"...Hmm~"

**"Beast!"**

"God bad breath!"

"...What?"

"Hellfire-ball!"

"..."

"Ice...missiles!"

"Just where are you pulling these names from..."

"I heard them somewhere."

"...Aren't you supposed to make them up yourself?"

"Nah, I'm sure no one will notice."

"They seem so...out of place."

"Yeah...they don't sound cool enough..."

_"Dragon Slayer!"_

"...Winged slayer!"

"...Giving up yet?"

"Why?"

"Should you really be renaming your spells?"

"It doesn't matter what you call it. It's still the same, right?"

"Well..."

"Hm~ maybe I should get some advice from the experts...Hey guys!"

"...No...God breath and Bad breath are two very different things..."

* * *

A/N: Developers must spend a lot of time coming up with names for everything...


	150. What's In a Name? 2

Disclaimer: Don't own.

Plays after "What's in a name?"

Arche is normal, **Chester is bold,** _Klarth is italics._

* * *

"Um...Dark savior, shadow servant, shadow flare..."

**"Eh. We'll get back to him."**

"Okay. Well, Luna's would be Luna Laser, right?"

**"Can't really be anything else."**

"How about Volt?"

**"Dunno. 10,000 volts?"**

"Hm...lightning rain?"

**"Thunder storm?"**

"...Skip him too?"

**"Gnome?"**

"No idea. What would you call a swarm of gnome-let missiles?"

**"Missile raid?"**

"...Next."**  
**

**"...We're not getting very far with this, are we?"**

"Guess not~"

_"...May I ask as to what you're doing?"_

"Ah. He's here."

_"..."_

"We got bored of renaming my spells so we tried yours."

**"The summons' attacks, anyway..."**

_"I see. Dare I ask what you came up with?"_

"We didn't really get that far...but, if you want to join in..."

**"How about Maxwell? I'd say..."**

"...Headbutt?"

**"Huh?"**

_"Care to...justify that?"_

"Ah, well, you remember when we were fighting him, right?"

_"Yes, I vaguely recall."_

"Remember when he started glowing an zigzagging all over the place?"

_"I'll admit that was rather annoying."_

"Yeah, he kept ramming into me and interrupting my chanting."

**"Yeah, but when Klarth summons him, he doesn't ram into things..."**

"...Maxwell! Use Headbutt! ...is what I was thinking."

_"Under no circumstances would I say such a thing."_

"How about...Luna! Use Luna Laser!"

_"Considering Luna doesn't have any other form of attack, that sounds redundant."_

**"I don't think you're going to get him to shout anything other than Sylph, Efreet, Shadow, or whatnot."**

"We'll see."

_"...No, we won't."_


	151. Electrocution

Disclaimer: Don't own.

This plays if you have Suzu in your party and everyone has used a thunder elemental attack in battle.

Suzu is normal, **Cless is bold, **_Chester is italics._

* * *

"I pity them."

_"Heh. They didn't stand a chance against us!"_

**"We've gotten stronger."**_  
_

"It looked painful."

_"Well...yeah."_

**"I guess we did overdo it, but..."**

"No...it was electrocution."

**"...Er...?"**

_"Oh, you mean Arche? Yeah, she's pretty scary when she's zapping everything to death..."_

**"Eh...how did you bring ****Arche into this?"**

_"Huh? Uh...well, the first thing that popped into my head..."_

**"Really? I was thinking about Volt..."**

_"Y,yeah, and him...ah. I guess we count too, right?"_

"...It reminds me...of Volt's cave."

_"Hm?"_

**(Black squiggly) "Don't remind me...that was horrible."**

_"__I guess that's not something that you could forget..."_

**(Glare) "Shouldn't friends help each other out?"**

_"But we did help you out...later."_

**"..."**

_"At least you gained...a valuable experience?"_

**"I could have done better without it."**

"Agreed."

_"Well, at least you two can relate to each other. I'm sure you guys can talk all about it..." (Exit)_

**"..."**

"..."

**"Somehow...I pity them too." **

"Yes." **  
**


	152. Spike Traps

Disclaimer: Don't own.

This plays if you walk on the spiked floor in the Morlia Mineshaft.

Arche is normal, **Cless is bold,** _Klarth is italics,_ Mint is underlined.

* * *

"Owowowow..."

"First aid!"

"...Still ow."

_(sigh) "Note to self...wear thicker shoes."_

**(Sweat drop) "It's not that bad..."**

_"Yes, well, after running around for...what? 8 floors? My feet aren't exactly in the best of shape."_

"...Who has time to lay out all these traps?"

_"Someone, apparently."_

"Yeah? Well, I'd like to give that 'someone' a piece of my mind..."

_"...if they weren't most likely dead by now."_

**"Er..."**

"Oof...why'd you stop?"

**"...Wrong way."**

"I suppose we'll just have to turn back, won't we?"

"Mint's taking this kind of well..."

_"She must have the patience of a saint..."_

"Looks like it."

_"...You know, couldn't you have just flown over these spikes?"_

"..."

_"...Arche?"_

"I think I'd like to rip a certain someone's spiky hair out right now."

_"..."_


	153. Trial and Error

Disclaimer: Don't own.

This plays when you reach floor 20 of the Morlia Mineshaft.

Cless is normal,** Arche is bold,** _Chester is italics._

* * *

"So many statues..."

_"Huh. They're really...realistic."_

**(Shudder) "...Kinda reminds me of Arsia's place."**

"Well, the steps are just over there, so..."

*THWACK!* (Cless gets pushed back)

"A, ow..."

**"It moved!"**

_"Should've known it wasn't going to be that easy..."_

"We'll have to figure something out."_  
_

**"Maybe you could try going around them?"**

*THWACK!* **  
**

"Ugh...no good."

_"Try running faster."  
_

*THWACK!*

(Black squiggly) "Not working."

_"Not fast enough." _

**"Try sneaking past it!"**

"...? It's not moving."

_"I guess it can't see you?" _

**"Okay, good...now, go left..."**

*THWACK! THWACK!*

**"?"**

_"Er...your left, his right."_

**"Oh. Right. Um...just do what you did before!"**

_"And go right this time!"_

**"Then left!"**

_"__No, forward!"_

**"Ah, wait! Go back!" **_  
_

"...Shouldn't you guys be following me?"

**"Someone has to test it out first."**

_"Yeah. Besides, I'm sure all that armor will protect you."_

"I feel like a crash test dummy..."

**"What's that?"**

"I'll figure this out myself." **  
**

**

* * *

**A/N: While it may seem amusing to watch Cless's sprite getting pushed all over the screen, I'm sure having a solid stone statue slamming into you full force isn't too much fun.

...And they probably didn't have crash test dummies anyway, but anything else I can think to put in there sounds weird.


	154. Out of Place Encounters

Disclaimer: Don't own.

This plays if you find the ninja who teaches Suzu Summon: Jiraiya in Shadow's Cave.

Cless is normal, **Mint is bold,**_ Klarth is italics, _Chester is underlined, _**Arche is bold and italics. **_

* * *

"Hey...how did she get down here without the red lantern?"

_"Hm. That is strange indeed. Was there some other way to bypass that door?"_

"Who knows?"_  
_

**"Will she be fine down here all by herself?" **

"Well, if she got this far already..."

_**"True. Even with all of us, it was still annoying to get down here."**_

_"Probably because some of us are making too much noise and alerting the enemy of our presence..."_

**_"Oh? And who might that be?"_**

"Well, let's see...a giant explosion in the middle of a dimly lit corridor isn't exactly inconspicuous."

_**"**__**Yeah? Well neither are...ah..." (Black squiggly)**_

**"Hm...do you think we should just leave her here, though?"  
**

"I think she'll be fine..."**  
**

_"I don't see why we should feel guilty if these people came here of their own accord."  
_

"Well, if they're in danger..."

_"Don't the ninjas we encounter usually mention something about this being a part of their training?" _

**"What about those people wandering in the Morlia Mineshaft?" **_  
_

"Oh. That's right...they were still there the last time we went, weren't they?"

_(sigh) "If they've survived there that long, I'm sure they'll be fine if we decide to check up on them next time."_

"How are you so sure?_"_

_"I just am."  
_

* * *

A/N: NPCs can somehow be found even in the most perilous of places and remain untouched by all the monsters residing there. _  
_


	155. Hunters

Disclaimer: Don't own.

This plays if you're in the forest of spirits.

Cless is normal, **Chester is bold, **_Mint is italics,_ Arche is underlined. 

* * *

"This place...it brings back memories."

**"Feels like a long time since we were last hunting here, huh?"**

"...Yeah. I almost miss that feeling."

**"...It couldn't hurt, could it?"**

"Well..."**  
**

**"Over there!"**

"Ah! Wait up!" **  
**

"Ehh~ where are they going?" 

_"__They're chasing after that boar."_

"Weirdos."

_"They look like they're having fun." _

"..."**  
**

**"Got it!"  
**

"Hyah!"

"What's the fun in that..."

**"You up for some cooked pork?"**

"Sure, why not."

**"Right. Then...knife?"**

"Here."**  
**

"Urgh."

_"...Maybe we should go somewhere else."  
_

**"Hey! You guys want some too?"**

"You're all...bloody. Wanna...clean yourself off first?"**  
**

**"Ah? Oh. Yeah, I guess so."  
**

"...Is it really that fun?"**  
**

**"Huh?"**

"Somehow, you looked wayy too happy when you were killing that boar..."

**"...It's not killing it. It's just this feeling you get...ah. I don't know how to explain. You sort of get caught up in the moment and..."**

"..."**  
**

**"Well...you've never went hunting before, have you?"**

"No. I don't think I want to, either..."

**"...It's not as bad as you think..."**

"...Whatever."

**"..."**

**

* * *

**

A/N: The idea just came to me while I was reading Lord of the Flies :/


	156. Random Scenarios

Disclaimer: Don't own.

Chester is normal, **Arche is bold**, _Klarth is italics. _

* * *

"...You are walking out of your house when you come across a mysterious package sitting outside your door. What do you do?"

**"Depends. What's in it?"**

"You'll have to open it first."

_"...Who sent it?"_

"Who knows?"

**"Fine. Open it."**

_"..."_**  
**

"There is an oddly shaped lamp inside."

_"...A lamp." _

**"Lemmie guess, we have to rub it?'**

"...What do you do?"

**"Rub it?" **

_"Wait. This sounds suspicious. It could be a trap..."  
_

"As soon as you touch the lamp, it disappears into a cloud of smoke and a person is now standing in its place."

_"And this person is..."_

"Do you want to talk to him?"

**"Sure." **

"He reveals that he dwells in the Wonderful World of Flavor and is out to—

_(Skeptical) "The Wonder Chef?" _

"...Do you want to learn the recipe or not?"

_"...This is making less sense by the minute."_

"Who said this was supposed to make sense?"

**"Learn it already."**

"You learn the recipe for...a sandwich." **  
**

_"...Does a sandwich really require a recipe?"  
_

"With your new found knowledge, what do you do?"

**"Make a sandwich." **

"Unfortunately, you have failed in making a sandwich."

**"...Are you implying something?" **

_"Move on already." _

"...You are about to exit the town when you hear shouting behind you. What do you do?"

**"Turn around." **

_"No, keep going. This kind of thing usually results in unnecessary involvement." _

"Well?"

**"...Ignore it." **

"You ignore all of the blood-curling screams and explosions and continue to walk. Congrats, you've gained the title of "Spineless coward." What do

you have to say about yourself?"

_"Hmph...Nothing. Why would I be talking to myself?"_

"While you are busy talking to yourself, you wander into the middle of nowhere and appear to be lost."

_"..."_

**"What now?"**

_"Keep walking until you see something familiar."_

"You succeed in getting yourself even more lost. It is now dark."

_"...Keep walking."_

"You walk off a cliff and fall to your doom."_  
_

_"..."_

**"Is this the part where we wake up and realize it was a dream?"**

"No. That's the end."

**"...Worst ending I've ever heard."**

_"Indeed. But we managed to waste a few minutes."_

"...Start over?"

**"Eh, why not?" **


	157. Random Scenarios 2

Disclaimer: Don't own.

Chester is normal, **Arche is bold**, _Klarth is italics. _

* * *

_"You are inside your house. The doors are locked."  
_

"Climb out the window then."

_"It is also locked."_

"Smash it?"

**"Waiit...he never said we didn't have the key..."**

"Er..."

_"...You smash the window open despite seeing the key right next to the door. Your partner is not amused."_

**"...Go out the front door."**

_"You ignore the broken window and head __out the front door. There is no one in sight."  
_

"...Ok. Keep going."

_"As soon as you set foot outside, you are greeted by several large monsters."_

"Kill them."

_"Unfortunately, you have left your weapons back inside your house."_

"Wha...since when?"

**"You could've given us a warning!"**

_"It's not my fault if you forget to check.__"_

"Tch...fine. Run back to the house."

_"You return to your house."_

"Get the weapons."

_"...You search your house but it appears that several things, including your weapons have disappeared."_

**"Didn't you just say..."**

_"You notice a shady person running off with a bag full of items."_

**"..."**

_"...Normally, people would lock their doors after they leave."_

"Not really...not around here, anyway."_  
_

**(Black squiggly) "Chase after the thief."**

"Wait, if he has our weapons then we need something to fight him with, right?"

**"Oh. Yeah...what do we have?"**

_"A shovel, a broom, a frying pan, a ladle, and a small stuffed animal. Take your pick."_

**"...What do you think?"**

"...Can we actually fight with any of these?"

**"Dunno...I guess I'll take the broom."**

"...Shovel."

_"You begin pursue the thief, but you are stopped by the monsters that you had previously encountered."_

**"Kill 'em."**

_"...Unfortunately, your attacks have only succeeded in aggravating them."_

**"Run...?"**

_"Escape is impossible. As for what happens next..."_

"...Was there even any way to win?"

**"That wasn't fair at all..."**

_"That's life isn't it? Nothing's ever fair." _**  
**


	158. A Friendly Race

Disclaimer: Don't own.

This plays if you have both the mach lad and mach man titles.

Cless is normal, **Chester is bold, **_Klarth is italics, _Mint is underlined, _**Arche is bold and italics. **_

* * *

**"...Let's settle this once and for all."**

"Heh. I won't lose!"

_**"Alright! We have a face off between the mach lad and mach man! Who will be deemed the fastest in the land?"**_

_"Remember, it's 3 laps around Alvanista. On your marks, get ready..." _**  
**

_"GO!"_

(running)_  
_

**"Move!"**

"Tch!"

"...They sure are energetic."

_"I suppose that's a good thing."_

"pant...pant..."

**"hah...hah..."**_  
_

"That's one! Keep it up!"

_"50 gald on Chester."  
_

_**"Hmph. We all know who's going to win this. 200 on Cless."  
**_

_"...Cless! Slow and steady wins the race!"_

_**"!"**  
_

"...?"

_**"He's calling you slow! Are you going to listen to him?"**_

"..." (sweat drop) 

_"Oh, looks like Chester's in the lead now." _

_**"..."**_

"That's two-

**"_HEY!"_**

**"What!"**

**_"Hi."_**

**"Gah!"**

"...Do your best."

_**"C'mon..."**_

_"Almost there..."_

**"...Aaaand..."**

"...ah...who won?"

"It was hard to see...I guess it could be a tie?"

**"I demand a rematch...If a certain _someone_ hadn't been screaming in my face..."**

"That's true..."**  
**

**_"Well, it's not like this guy was any better."_**

_"Hm? I beg to differ. I was simply offering some sound advice." _**_  
_**

**_"That wasn't the least bit distracting, huh?"_**

_"Distract? It was meant to guide him on the right path."_

_**"...Lousy guide."**_


	159. Hot and Cold

Disclaimer: Don't own.

This plays if you're on the continent of Frezkiel.

Arche is normal, **Klarth is bold**.

* * *

"Ahh~ I'm not sure whether it's worse here or at Freyland...hot, cold, hot, cold..."

**"Well, if you consider it, both places have their pros and cons."**

"Yeah?"

**"If you'll consider the desert climate of Freyland, you'll never have to worry about cold weather and such under the blazing heat of the sun.  
**

**...Whereas here, you have the constant piling of snow on the ground, the occasional high-speed winds and subzero temperatures."  
**

"I'm not seeing any good points."

**"Ah. I almost forgot to mention the beauty of sunburns, heatstroke, hallucinations, snow blindness, frostbite, hypothermia..."**

(shiver) "...Yeah, real nice."

**"Personally...I'd say I prefer the heat. Having to constantly shovel the buildup of snow on a daily basis seems tedious. **

**Sigh..and the snow keeps getting into my shoes..."**

"I'd prefer somewhere...more normal. Besides, there's always bugs around when it's hot and you have that icky, sweaty feeling..."

**"That's true. But there are ways to beat the heat."**

"And the cold?"

**"That you'll just have to cope with."**

(Black squiggly) **  
**


	160. Chester's Nightmare

Disclaimer: Don't own.

Chester is normal, **Arche is bold.**

* * *

"...Tsk. It came loose again..."

**"..."**

"Hey. Do you have a rubber band or something?"

**"Sure. Here ya go."**

"...Preferably not a ribbon."

**"You said, "or something." **

"Something that isn't pink and frilly."

**"Why not?"**

"...I'm not going around in public with that thing in my hair."

**"You don't see me complaining."**

"You're a girl. I'm a GUY."

**"And? I'm sure a guy could wear this too."**

"And I'm sure they call those kinds of people cross-dressers."

**"Hm..."**

"...Why are you staring at me like that?"

**"Wanna try this dress on too?"**

"...Arche...?"

**"And maybe give you some braids..."  
**

"Get away from me."

**"Come on~"**

"Don't come any closer...!"

**"Ehehe~" (heart)**

*insert scream here*

* * *

**"SHUT IT!"**

"ARCHE!"

**"YES, it's ME. Geez, don't go daydreaming on us..."**

"...Now that I think about it, I should've known that something was wrong when you wanted to jump me, tie me up and gag me..."

**"Huh?"**

"...And force me into an overly lacy, frilly, skimpy dress."

**"... ... ...UGH. That just gave me a really bad mental image. Seriously, what the heck are you dreaming about?" **

* * *

A/N: ...Sir, I blame you for planting that idea in my head. **  
**


	161. Magic Lipstick

Disclaimer: Don't own.

This plays if you use the magic lipstick and purchase something.

Cless is normal, **Chester is bold,** _Klarth is italics,_ Arche is underlined, _**Mint is bold and italics.**_

* * *

"Huh. This stuff actually works."

_**"It went rather well, wouldn't you say?"**_

"..."

**"Did we really have to wear it too...?"**

_"If anything, I think we shocked the poor shopkeeper."_

**"Explains why we didn't have to pay the full price. The guy wasn't in his right mind."  
**

"Maybe we should wear it more often, eh Mint?"

_**"It couldn't hurt once in a while..."**_

"You don't really need it though...I think you look fine as it is."

_**"Ah...is that true?"**_

"Hehe~ really~?"

**"I agree. I mean, putting on too much just makes it look ugly. Right, Cless?"**

"Er...I...guess you could say that?"**  
**

**_"..."_  
**

"..."

**"...What's that look for?"  
**

"For ruining the moment."

(Sweat drop) "..."


	162. Whack A Gnome

Disclaimer: Don't own.

Plays when you're in the middle of fighting Gnome.

Arche is normal, _Klarth is italics**.**_

* * *

"Anyone up for a game of whack a Gnome?"

_"Is this really the time?"_

"It's simple. Once his head pops up, be sure to smack it back into the ground!"

_"That's if he decides to 'pop up.' Aside from that, I'm afraid we're lacking a giant mallet to do so with."_

"No worries. Just hit him with all you've got."

_"__Hn. That's the general idea, isn't it?"_

"Ah. There's your big, squeaky mallet."

_"...I don't think a pow hammer __is going to suffice."_

"That's as close as you'll get."

_"I'll pass. There are better options at hand."_

"Remember, whoever scores the most points wins~"

_"Hah? Since when did this become about points?"_

"The more hits you get in, the more points you gain~ What, you didn't know that already?"

_"..."_

"Well, either way, you'll be getting some valuable experience, you know?"

_"I suppose..."  
_


	163. Unbearable Conditions

Disclaimer: Don't own.

Plays if you're in critical health in Odin's Tower and take damage from the heat.

Arche is normal, **Klarth is bold,** _Cless is italics,_ Mint is underlined, _**Chester is bold and italics.**_

* * *

"T, this is torture...I don't think I can take anymore..."

"I wouldn't mind if...someone filled in for me..."

_"H, hey...__don't fail on us now, guys..."_

**"I'm too old for this..."**

**_"Does that make me too young for this?"_**

_"Come on...we can't stay here forever..."_

"You can go up there by yourself..."

_"I'm not going up there alone...aren't we a team, here?"_

**"If you stay really still for a moment...the heat's almost bearable."**

"It's still hot."

_"Maybe if you guys would take your minds off of the heat..."_

_**"Sorry, but it's kind of hard to ignore..."**_

**"It didn't work in the desert...I don't think it'll help us now."**

"I'm seeing red..."

**"Probably the lava. Which, again, is extremely hot."**

_"...Red's the color of apples too. So...try thinking of apples?"_

*silence*_  
_

_**"...I gave an apple to Ami before we left...and then...well, you know."**_

**"I'm sure there's an apple waiting for me on my desk back at home...ah, Milard..."  
**

"Mom..."

"..."

_(Black squiggly) "Okay...maybe apples were a bad idea. How about...er...tomatoes?"_

"...I'm hungry."

"It's too hot to cook."

_**"Either we'll burn up here or we'll starve to death."**_

**"****Ah, the possibilities..." **_**  
**_

_"...You guys are doing this on purpose, aren't you?"_


	164. Gald Toss

Disclaimer: Don't own.

Plays if you've seen "Excessively Rich."

Suzu is normal, **Chester is bold,** _Klarth is italics._

* * *

**"Ah, Su-**

"Hiyaah!"

**"Wha? ...Gald?"  
**

_"Hm. It's impractical, but it may have its uses. Hah!"_

**"Oi...what am I, your target practice?"**

_"No...you just happened to be in the general direction of my aim."  
_

"Your aim is slightly off."

**(Black squiggly) **_  
_

_"I suppose the good thing about this is that at least a few are bound to hit."_

"It's still too weak."

**"And a waste of gald, you know..."**

_"You could say we're literally throwing our money away."_

**"...Yeah, I can see that. The question is, why?"**

"Greed can corrupt people."

_"Indeed. This is for the greater good."_

**"...And?"**

_"For one thing, there's really no use in traveling_ _with_ _an absurd amount of gald. It's a pain to carry around and manage."_

"I thought it might be useful as a weapon."

**"..."**

_"Well, against people, perhaps. Assuming you have the proper skills."_

**"?"**_  
_

_"Though, considering our foe...it's essentially useless. I guess if you were to throw it at a good distance from above, __it could come down with enough force _

_to cause damage but..."_

**"There's still better ****things to toss around."**

_"Yes."_**  
**

"Hm..."


	165. The Doom Blade

Disclaimer: Don't own.

Plays if you have the Doom Blade equipped on Cless and have won over 30 battles with it equipped.

Cless is normal, **Suzu is bold, **_Chester is italics._

* * *

**"A magic sword whose blade blackens as it absorbs misfortune...what an ominous description."**

"Yeah, but it's nothing to worry about."

**"How so?"**

"Well...I've been using it for a while. If anything, I feel kind of stronger..."

_"That's Cless for you. Doesn't let anything bother him, eh?"_

"Heh."_  
_

**"Perhaps...its power increases as it absorbs the blood of those unfortunate enough to meet their doom at the edge of this blade..."**

"Um...I guess you could say it like that..."

_"When you put it that way...that's pretty damn creepy."_

**"I wonder...what would those slain think of this?"  
**

"..."

_"Hm...they'd be royally pissed off? Hey, they might even come back to haunt you from the grave~"_

**"They say that those who do not feel accomplished will eventually come back to settle the score."**

_"Scary~"_**  
**

"H, hey...what are you guys trying to say...?"

_"Ah, don't worry. You have us to watch your back, right?"  
_

"I'm not so sure about that..."

**"Anything can happen when you least expect it."**

_"That too."_

**"Their misfortune may very well become your own someday..."  
**

"..."

**"I'm joking."**

"Somehow...I'm not sure I'll be able to sleep well tonight..." **  
**


	166. Klarth and Milard

Disclaimer: Don't own.

Plays if you examine all the shelves in Klarth's Institute.

Klarth is normal, **Cless is bold,** _Mint is italics,_ Milard is underlined.

* * *

"While I appreciate your...eagerness for knowledge, would you mind putting things back in the correct place? It just...irks me."

**"Ah."**

_"We're sorry."_

"Oh, please...half the time, he has to rely on me to place everything back in order."

"That's not true. Besides, when you do take it upon yourself to do that, I can't even find anything anymore!"

"And you're saying you can when you have them strewn all over the place like this?"

"Yes! I'm keeping them out for future reference."

"You hardly spare a glance at them!"

"I just so happen to have other matters to concern myself with and don't have the time right now."

"Really...that always seems to be the case for you."

"Hmph."

"Well, since I suppose you'll be gone for a while, you won't mind me cleaning out the place..."

"! Where are you taking those..."

"Surely you won't be needing such useless things..." (Exit)

"Hey! Who gave you permission...? Get back here!" (Runs after her)

**(Sweat drop) "Um..."**

_"They seem to have a nice relationship..."_

**"They're acting like kids right now..." **_  
_

* * *

A/N: My brother...is a slob. When I've finally had it with his room and decide to clean it out one summer...he gets pissed and yells how he can't find anything anymore. *twitch* Yeh? The thing you're looking for is right in front of you, dude. Are. you. friggin. blind? *shakes fist* /end rant_.  
_


	167. It's a Warning

Disclaimer: Don't own.

Plays if you attempt to take the northern path to Euclid in the past.

Klarth is normal, **Cless is bold,** _Mint is italics._

* * *

"...I'm sure that sign was here for a reason."

**"Sign?"**

"The one right over there?"

_"It says...'Beware the path to the north!"_

**"Oh...that makes sense."**

"Makes sense?"

**"In my time, the words were to faded to read. But there was a statue blocking the way, so..."**

"And you didn't think that it was some sort of sign?"

**"No. I just moved it out of the way and continued up the path."**

"..."

**"What?"**

"I'm a bit concerned about your...sense of judgment."

**"Why's that?"**

"...Wouldn't the most logical thing to do be to take heed of the warning?"

**"Well...'Beware' is the same as 'be alert,' right? So as long as we're focused..."**

"...I sincerely hope you know what you're doing."

**"Of course."**

* * *

A/N: *Sees a warning, but charges in anyway for the heck of it*


End file.
